My Gift
15
I try to be poetic with my love for Lwandle but every time I try I fail. I will start well and when I’m feeling like a poet I flank and I sound like a child in kindergarten resisting a poet and not like those big shot poets.
I feel like if I sound like those big shot poets my love for her will sound fancy but it does not but that does not mean I love her any less.
I have fallen dee-per for her and I’m scared for my heart. I’m scared of how broken it will be if she ever hurts me. I don’t think I will be able to live if that ever happens.
I don’t think I would be able to function like how a normal person should function. I finished my exams and have been waiting for my results.
The wait is not that bad because I know I worked ha-rd during my exams and there is nothing that would make me fail. Maybe I might not get the seven famous distinctions but I will get what I will get and pa-ss.
Lwandle has also influenced the wait not being hard. She has been there for me and I have grown to know her better. I have grown to understand her gift and the episodes she has and how to deal with them. She has and one trip she had to take because of her gift this month and the one week I spent not seeing her felt like a lifetime.
Like now
I have not seen her for a week because MaKhumalo is not feeling fine and I feel like dying. I feel like I have been asked to live without my heart for a week and Nandipha is not helping. She says I did this to myself by allowing myself to be second best to Lwandle but I don’t regret the choice I made. I don’t regret agreeing to be Lwandle’s second girlfriend because I have never been this happy and have never been this in love. People are always preaching about following your heart and my heart is leading me to Lwandle the girl who has my heart.
I’m now getting ready to go and see her. We are meeting at the royal house and I don’t mind that because I’m not used to it. My mother is not home she went to gossip with her friend so I don’t have anyone who will question where I am going. I don’t know what to wear I have been debating between the green dress and the black dress which is making me frustrated. I throw them both on the bed and walk to the closet to look for something else to wear. I wish I could wear Jeans I know I could wear them with anything and it would still be fine but I don’t want to seem disrespectful.
“Awuganele KwaZulu wena”
I hear Nandipha’s voice at the back of my head. She has been preaching about me not being married to the Zulu family for a long time now. She says I should not subject myself to looking like a granny when they have not even paid income Kamama. I remember laughing when she said that but she says Lwandle took my vi-rginity even though my hymen is still intact but I still slept with her meaning she should show some respect to my family. I don’t know if I want her to do the right thing because of obvious reasons.
I put the thoughts behind me and take the jean that I have been looking at for more than five minutes and find a shirt to pair them with. I’m telling myself that I won’t put too much thought into it because if I do I will be here for the whole day.
After I’m done getting dressed I take my phone and go out locking the door. We have a pot plant near the door where we keep the other key so I take my own and go. The walk to the palace is not that long because it’s not hot today. The heat is fairly normal and it gives me time to think about what I will do when I get my results. Before I know if I’m outside the royal house and the guards let me in without any hustle.
I have walked the walk to her bedroom a lot of times now that I don’t get lost that if I could go blind I would be able to walk from the gate to her bedroom without getting hurt or lost. I open the front door and I don’t find anyone in the living room.
I’m sure they are going by their day I hope I don’t find MaKhumalo by the bedroom like I did last time. I walk to the bedroom and when I open the door I find her sleeping. I want to join her in bed but the room is untidy. I don’t want to join her in bed with a dirty bedroom like this. I start moving around slowly trying not to make noise while I clean. After half an hour I’m done cleaning and she still has not woken up.
I wonder what made her tired because she is not a de-ep sleeper. After I put everything in its place I run to the bed and jump on it. She starts moving around and I keep on jumping till she is fully awake.
“I missed you yazi.”
I tell her and she rubs her eyes and I think she is trying to get rid of sleep that is invading her body.
“When did you arrive?”
She asks me and I look up like I’m thinking.
“Like half an hour ago I cleaned around because my girlfriend likes being in a dirty place.”
I tell her and she sits properly pulling me closer to her. It feels nice lying on her chest and hearing her heartbeat.
“I got back izolo but I was tired did not even feel like cleaning Kodwa thanks”
She says and I feel her li-ps come in contact with my forehead. Her breath is walk and it’s making me crawl a little but not in a bad way it’s a very good feeling.
“You welcome I think I’m hungry.”
I say to her and she laughs. I’m sure it has to do with the fact that I said I think and not say that I’m hungry.
“Manje ufuna ukudla mina Fuze?”
She asks me and I shake my head knowing if I agree to this I won’t live in this bedroom.
“Kodwa wena let me get dressed keh then we go make you food.”
She says and I move from her.
“Now close your eyes so I get dressed.”
She says and I laugh putting my palms on my face *to cover my eyes. I can hear movements as she gets out of bed. We started this whole close your eyes when she is nak-ed when I once said she should not walk around half-nak-ed she is traumatizing me as a child and she said I should st* art closing my eyes. Little does she know that I do look when she is looking at the other side like now. She is wearing a white vest and white pan-ties and they look perfect with her skin tone. I get lost in thinking about the things she would do to me that I don’t feel her in front of me till she shakes me.
“Asambe then”
She says and I get up following her to the kitchen. I’m holding her from behind and I fell short when I’m like this.
“What do you want to eat vele?”
She asks me about going to the fridge.
“Anything.”
I tell her jumping and sitting on the kitchen island.
“Ham and cheese them.”
She says bringing them out of the fridge and coming to me. She drops them next to me and comes in between my legs. This is her way of saying I want a ki-ss so I give it to her before she can ask.
I have missed ki-ssing her like this so it feels like magic but I start feeling uncomfortable. Like someone is watching us and when I pull away I see her.
MaKhumalo.
She is the one who is watching us and I don’t know how to react to that. I want to jump off the island but I can’t with Lwandle between my legs.
“Sorry I didn’t mean to stare.”
She says and goes to the fridge
“Don’t worry about it nana.”
Lwandle says and spa-nks her as she pa-sses by her.
.
.
.
TBc