EPISODE 1 💚💚
“Don’t cry my love, i know you do believe in destiny. This was destined to happen and nothing would have st©pped it from happening” Emmanuel whispered to me, but i really was inconsolable because i knew what i did was beyond pardon.
“How do i face Samuel after this? How do i stand in his pres£nce, what will be his reaction when he finds out” i wondered sorrowfully.
“Baby st©p crying, the deed has alre-ady been done, it’s now left for us to mend the rest” he pleaded,
“And how do you suggest we do that?” i asked with tears.
“I’m very serious about marrying you, all i nee-d is just your cons£nt, leave the rest for me, it will be history in no time” he begged pas-sionately.
“I can handle myself. I perfectly knew what i was doing when we made love”I said to myself like a lost soul.
“Oh Mary st©p talking nons-en-se” he consoled and k!$$£d my hair, “We are in this together, count on me for anything” he spoke calmly, ma-king me stare into his eyes. I saw sincerity, fear and uncertainty in them.
“All i want is for you to be the mother of my children, i say this with all sincerity, open your soul to me baby. I nee-d not only your b©dy, but your soul and spirit as well, plea-se make me yours” he begged.
“Emmanuel plea-se let me be, i’m still very troubled and confused” i sobbe-d.
“Why is it so difficult for you to accept me my dear why?” he asked eagerly,
“Because i owe Samuel a lot, he was by my side when you abandoned me, filled my spirit when i was weak, and defended me when you weren’t there” i poured out. He instantly blu-shed,
“I may not be very much in love with him like i used to, but i’ll still be loyal to him till he sets me free” i added, while he stared at me with a coloured face.
“What nons-en-se are you saying?” he asked curiously with tremblingl-ips,
“I’ll be very honest with him, i’ll confess everything that happened tonight once i go back to my lodge tomorrow. If he breaks up with me over it, so be it, you can then have your chance” i promised, leaving him in a terrible shock.
“Are you out of your mind or what, surely he will end things with you but i don’t think he will let you go without first breaking your head, the fury of a cheated guy is very enormous my dear, are you trying to kill yourself?, Mary what has come over you?” he asked anxiously. I smiled painfully and shook my head.
“That’s the only atonement i can offer, if he kills me over it then you know we weren’t destined to be together. Whatever will be will be, my life is alre-ady messed up, i have no reason to fear anymore” i murmured. He quietly stood up with a very terrible sick look and shrugged.
“Alright let’s see how it pla-ys out, but my dear i think you are not okay, your grief has affected you badly” he murmured sadly.
“Whatever is written can never be changed, if something happens to me, then know it was destined to happen” i replied with a weak smile. He nervously dressed up and left without another word. So very shaken he was as he left the room that fateful night.
“MY God hope i’m not insane?” i prayed as i waited for Monday…..
MONDAY 7:15AM
Emmanuel dropped me in front of my lodge. I thanked him, opened the front pas-s£nger’s door and tried to alight, but he quic-kly gr@bb£d my left hand and stared at me.
“plea-se Mary i beg you, don’t do anything silly” he pleaded. I smiled and shook my head,
“As for my confession, i will go ahead with it. Don’t you worry about me Emmanuel, i can perfectly take good care of myself” i as-sured him before alighting.
Walking into my room, i rehearsed all i planned to tell Samuel. It really wasn’t easy ma-king up my mind for such deed, but like i told Emmanuel, ‘nothing would st©p me from going ahead with it’.
Just like fate would have it, i ran into Samuel at the staircase, he was going downstairs to fetch water but instantly froze when he saw me. There was suspicion and relief in his eyes as they fell on me, while i nervously returned his look and greeted him.
“Mary where are you coming from?? I know you aren’t coming from your house?” he asked inquisitively.
“Of course i’m not coming from home” i replied quietly, left him and climbe-d the stairs. He quic-kly followed me, abandoning the water he was on his way to get.
“So where went you?” he asked when we got to my room.
“Do you really want to know?” i asked calmly as i sat on my be-d. He stood beside me, scanning me intently with his eyes.
“Do i still owe you any explanation concerning my movements? Isn’t our relationsh!pofficially over?” i asked with a dirty smile. He scoffed and bit hisl-ips
“I see you are trying very much to ha-rd en your heart, no problem but i still insist to know” he muttered.
“Alright since you insist, i spent my Sunday at Emmanuel’s family house and i’m just coming from there” i opened up coldly. His face instantly coloured. There was shock, pain, disbelief and sadness in his eyes as he stared at me.
“No it’s not true” he murmured with a broken voice, sat on my be-d and covered his face with his palms. He never cried out but i knew he weeped in his heart.
I stared at him clueless on what next to say nor how to behave towards him. He sat with his face covered for about fifteen minutes before composing himself and drawing close to me once again.
“Did he, did he t©uçh, t©uçh you?” he nervously asked. I was instantly torn between telling him the truth or lying to him. My confusion left me silent which equally confirmed his fear.
“Choi Mary, why, why nau??” he asked murderously with unshed tears melting his eyes. I was unable to stand his voice nor gaze any longer. I quietly stood up and backed him.
“I don’t deserve you Samuel, i really do care about you, but i don’t un-derstand my flesh anymore nor the cravings in my heart. plea-se free yourself from this torment and permit me to get another girl for you” i prayed with a fast pounding heart. But all he did was just to shed his tears which he very much struggled to hold, silently on my be-d. I was very t©uçhed and would have cried beside him if not that i wanted him to let me out of his life.
Patiently i waited for him to come around. I knew only one thing could happen that moment. Either he ends it like a man or ends up humiliating me. No matter which he chooses, i knew nothing would make him want to continue with me.
Only a woman has the ability to s£nd a great man to his grave without lifting a f!nger.
“But what really took you to his house?” Samuel asked minutes later, after cleaning his eyes.
“His mum invited me for a little chat, but when i got there a heavy rain broke out and i was f0rç£d to spend the night with them” i answered calmly. He swallowed ha-rd with pain, his eyes soa-ked once again with tears.
I really was uncomfortable watching him cry, i never knew guys do cry for love nor cry in such undignifying manner. Yes i was very t©uçhed, but his tears only drew out pity from me. Nothing more, nothing less.
I knew he was very hurt and disappointed, but all i eagerly waited was for him to cut the last rope loosely binding us.
“What do i do now?” he murmured unhappily,
“It’s very obvious i do not deserve you, plea-se purge me from you heart and permit me to find a suitable girl for you” i begged calmly. He breathed de-eply and covered his face again.
“Seriously Mary, i don’t know why all these are happening, we have a great relationsh!pgoing between us, and now you are breaking my heart and ma-king me the laughing stock of everyone. I hate to love you” he poured out bitterly, while i closed my eyes as his furious words registered in me.
“I gave you everything you wanted and you are now paying me back with this unjust behaviour, it’s very unfair” he cried and stood up.
I anxiously stared at him with my hopes up. I was very sure he was about leaving my life for good. My eyes melted as i watched him walk to the door. Truly he never deserved such treatment.
He silently stood beside my door with his left hand on the door knob for some minutes, before turning to face me once again. He stared intensely at me for a while before advancing towards me with an unhappy look.
“I can’t walk out from your life because of this single mistake Mary, we have been together for a long while and you haven’t given me cause to complain till Emmanuel showed up. I still do love you, let’s just forget everything and start afresh. I know you are acting the way you do because you are very confused, however i do appreciate your honesty, not every girl will confess such a horrible deed. I do prefer the devil i know than the saint i don’t know. I still do love you, let’s start all over again and put all that has happened these past few weeks behind us” he calmly said with a broken voice and eyes filled with tears, as he squ-atted by my side. I was de-eply stunned, shocked, surprised and moved.
I never expected such response from him. It truly left me a bit relieved, disappointed and happy. Infact my confusion reached its peak that moment.
I WAS Lost
💚💚 EPISODE 2 💚🌿
He silently stood beside my door with his left hand on the door knob for some minutes, before turning to face me once again. He stared intensely at me for a while before advancing towards me with an unhappy look.
“I can’t walk out from your life because of this single mistake Mary, we have been together for a long while and you haven’t given me cause to complain till Emmanuel showed up. I still do love you, let’s just forget everything and start afresh. I know you are acting the way you do because you are very confused, however i do appreciate your honesty, not every girl will confess such a horrible deed. I do prefer the devil i know than the saint i don’t know. I still do love you, let’s start all over again and put all that has happened these past few weeks behind us” he calmly said with a broken voice and eyes filled with tears, as he squ-atted by my side. I was de-eply stunned, shocked, surprised and moved.
I never expected such response from him. It truly left me a bit relieved, disappointed and happy. Infact my confusion reached its peak that moment.
“No” i cried,
“Yes Mary” he murmured, holding my face with both hands as he stared into my eyes,
“You owe me this chance and a whole lot, so let’s give it another trial at least till i finish my degree exams and if things doesn’t still improve between us, you can then leave for good” he added seriously, while i swallowed ha-rd with a de-eply coloured face.
There was fear, uncertainty and disbelief in my eyes as i silently stared back at him. I lost my voice that moment because his decision totally disoriented me, though in all honesty i owed him that benefit.
“Seriously, what do i do now?” i wondered helplessly.
“Samuel won’t let me go and there stood Emmanuel behind, breathing down my n£¢k with fire and pas-sion. I truly felt very committed to Samuel but my b©dy yearned for Emmanuel, leaving my spirit utterly confused and my soul lost.
I really wasn’t a girl who could afford d@t!ngtwo guys at the same time, something i do detest with pas-sion, but i now found myself heading towards that dangerous path.
6:30pm
I was lying on my be-d, re-ading a christian book on spiritual growth to calm my nerves when my phone rang. I dropped my book and glanced at my phone, it was Emmanuel calling,
“Hi i’m in front of your lodge, can you be able to come out?, the gate-man won’t let me in” he asked calmly,
“Okay, i’m coming” i replied and hung up.
Minutes later
I calmly walked to his car, opened the front pas-s£nger’s door, entered and sat beside him.
“How far?” he asked hopefully,
“Fine sha” i replied calmly,
“So how did it go?” he curiously asked, while i breathed de-eply.
“I confessed to him like i promised, but instead of breaking up or getting angry, he simply forgave me and begged for us to continue with the relationsh!p” i explained,
“Holy Moses!” Emmanuel exclaimed, snapping his f!ngersin disbelief.
“I seriously don’t know what to do and you alre-ady know the condition i gave you last night” i added calmly.
He strongly held my left hand forcing me to stare into his eyes.
“I’’m really way too big to be fighting for your love with an un-dergraduate, but i equally can’t deny what we had last night was very real. For that reason i will fight to the end just to have you, and nothing will st©p me either” he murmured seriously, ma-king me g@sp.
The evening breeze blew on us as we stared at each other silently.
How do i redeem myself?
How do i untangle myself from this rope?? Or should i hang myself with it?? I wondered de-eply.
____________
I really can’t believe he forgave you” he murmured, breaking the silence between us,
“Yea because he loves me a lot” i replied proudly, “i know you won’t if you were in his shoes” i accused. He simply smiled and said nothing.
“I have to get going, it’s alre-ady getting very late, i shouldn’t be out of my room by this hour” i said and made to leave, but he still held me strongly, preventing me from leaving.
“So what happens to us?” he asked curiously,
“Emmanuel abeg there is no us, i thought you promised to wait eternity for me nau? Just keep waiting even if it means waiting till next life” i said a bit coldly. My reply made him loos£n his grip. I instantly snatched my hand.
“Don’t let your confusion ruin your life” he murmured coldly and looked away. I eyed him silently before trying once again to leave his car.
“Mary wait” he commanded calmly. I obeyed and st©pped.
“I really can’t believe you went back to him after what happened last night between us, so you will continue the relationsh!pwith him like nothing happened between us abi?” he asked,
“plea-se don’t insult me” i coldly replied and tried to alight from his car, but he quic-kly drew forward and gr@bb£d my left hand once again.
“What if at the end it didn’t work out between you guys? Can you live with the memory that you had the opportunity to set things right and you didn’t??” he asked, while i kept quiet, thinking over his words.
“I know you do love me, i know i still have the treasure i took away from you the very first time we had fun. Your Sam knows that, he equally knows you don’t love him as much as you love me. He equally knows he’s fighting a lost battle, and i think he is habouring something which you are too blind to notice. What will you do if he finally abandons you at a point where there is no turning back?” he asked. I silently shook nervously,
“plea-se Emmanuel st©p talking ru-bbish, you are hurting my feelings” i murmured with quiveringl-ips.
“I tell you the truth my dear, for now you may seem like the perfect choice to him because he hasn’t yet explored other possibilities, he is yet to explore the world my dear. Do you think he will ever forget the confession you made to him today?? I tell you, he will never forget nor push it away from his mind. He simply begged you because he had no choice, because he had his dignity to protect. You can doubt me, but i swear you will remember this moment in few years coming. I’m a guy and i just told you how we guys reason. Guys groom love, we don’t fall for love, but we can fall for lvst. We fight most times just to protect our pride and not because we are in love” he poured out while i coloured and shook immensely. His words were hurting me, but i couldn’t find the strength to run away, my ears eagerly listened.
“I have explored the world and returned because i discovered how unique you are, can you swear he will return when he graduates and stays away from you for sometime, with the memory of your exploits buried in his head?? He asked.
“I can’t lie to you my dear, i know we both love each other, but do forget the silly remark i made about waiting eternity for you. I can only hopefully wait two more weeks for you to think over all i said and decide if to continue with him or start all over with me. That’s all i can say for now my dear, so plea-se don’t hurt our future. He concluded and prayed.
I breathed de-eply, summoned up my strength, and ran out of his car without even saying good night to him.
“I now have only two weeks to make the final decision and choose between the guy i love and the guy i owe my happiness, which way??” i wondered tearfully as i ran to my room that fateful evening…
WATCHOUT FOR EPISODE 3