♥️T.H.R.E.E♥️
THEME: {Where do I belong??}
✍️Written By Precious Pinky
❣️Episode 85&86❣️
★★★★★
????Cleo’s pov????
I just couldn’t look away.
I was hurting de-ep down but the strength, the courage to look away wasn’t there.
It almost felt like I was fated to see a scene like this unfold in front of me.
It almost as if my ill-luck fate to love was determined to make life a living hell for me.
First it was my first love _whose name I never want to mention ever again_ And now it was Lexi, my second love.
Why does life have to be this mean to me?
Why can’t I be like Brenden? The guy whose name was the talk of school. Every girl are willing to spend just a night on his bed even if they won’t be privileged to be with him again. Or better still, Lena? Yes, she was the school meanest bit-ch and everyone probably hates her but still, she was the beautiful girl every guy wants to have s** with. Or why can’t I just be like Kathy, Pearl, Arthur, Davis or even Lexi? They all had a perfect love story… especially Gwendolyn. The girl who doesn’t even know her worth. How can two siblings be in love with one girl? No, they might not have realized that fact yet but I already worked out the puzzle.
I mean, it was very obvious. They might have tried hiding their feelings but trust me they didn’t do a pretty job at doing so.
It all started the day Gwen fell into coma. I wasn’t blind not to see the siblings extraordinary worry and fears of losing a girl they barely even know.
I have always had a crush on Lexi so I actually know a lot about her _Hey, I’m not a stalker or anything. But looking out for a girl you love isn’t a crime, right?_ I know the fact that Lexi hardly gets emotional. When Rowan got into an accident and was rushed to the hospital. Yes, she was worried but she didn’t get so worked up about the situation.
She was still living her life to the fullest. Anyone who saw her at that period of time wouldn’t even know her boyfriend was fighting for his life in the hospital.
And as for Brenden, He doesn’t remember people’s name unless he cares about them.
It was even very obvious that he has a thing for Gwendolyn.
Gwendolyn doesn’t even know about any of this. She was just lost in between the two siblings, not even knowing where she stands.
I wish I was that lucky when it comes to love.
I wish I could be that happy and…I don’t know.
Earlier at school, I had overheard Lexi and Kathy’s discussion. I knew I already lost my chances of being with Lexi because she was so de-eply in love with Gwen _I wasn’t surprise, though_ But…I felt broken, sad and scared.
I couldn’t even bring myself to tell Gwen anything so I decided to do what I thought would be best for me… I ignored her. She tried talking to me but I completely ignored her. Yes, I was giving her attitude and I admit, it was very stupid of me to do but at the same time it was the only safest thing I could think of.
Gwen is like a sister from another mother to me. I love her so much from the very first day I set eyes on her.
She is real, smart, beautiful, intelligent, kind, caring, optimistic, friendly, and most importantly she’s ready to defend the defenseless. She’s just too unique and special.
Give me one reason why anyone won’t love such a carefree person?
I give her the credit of being special and all that but nothing changes the heartbreak I was feeling right now.
I was desperate for love, care and attention.
When I told my first love about my feelings for her, I saw the fear in her eyes. She backed away from me shaking her head vigorously.
She was straight…I was stupid not to have considered that first before opening up to her like that.
I know I didn’t tell Lexi about my feelings,,,well I was afraid.
She had a boyfriend which, we all thought she loved, if I may add.
I was only trying to be calm and careful not to scare her away like I did with Bi…my first love.
Thoughts like; What if she start avoiding me if I tell her about my feelings? What if she insult me publicly like my first love did? What if she start hating me? were the only thing going throu-ghmy head and that was what stopped me from saying a word to her about my feelings.
And now that there was a confirmation that she was actually g-ay,,,she loves someone else.
Hot tears streamed down my face as I stared at their ki-ssing figure.
Judging by Gwen stiffness, she was still in de-ep shock about two things; One, Lexi confession to her. And two, the ki-ss.
~Walk away. Walk away~ My head kept screaming at me to save myself from this pain and heartbreak but my legs were just too numb to move.
“What’s going on?” I heard a voice asked from behind. I stayed quiet. My mouth were too heavy to talk. My li-ps were trembling. My fist kept clenching and unclenching by itself. In other words, I simply had no control of myself. “Wait, is that…?”
That voice.
My eyes went wide as my sense of recognition kicked in.
I turned around and found myself staring at surprise Brenden, whose mouth was dropped open, eyes narrowed in anger, fist clenched, face drenched off its color and were completely white now.
“Brenden…” I began but someone interrupted me.
“Cleo,” I looked back and saw Gwen and Lexi staring at us now. “Cleo…” She tried reaching out to me but I quickly backed away from her.
What was I doing?
Why was I backing away?
She didn’t do anything wrong.
It wasn’t her fault that Lexi chose her and not me.
Why do I feel so upset about the situation now?
We don’t force people to love us…mom once told me the day I got rejected by my first love. She said and i quote;
“Love is a wonderful feeling and yet dangerous. It kills and at the same time save. We don’t force people to love us…, as long as we love them that’s enough. Don’t feel bad about anything, my sweet child. The girl who will love you unconditionally will surely come by. It might not be today but trust me tomorrow is there for us to keep hoping.”
Mom was right.
I’ve lived the rest of my life keeping that advice in heart.
I decided to let go of my first love and just focus on my….Wait, maybe I actually never let go. Maybe I was still feeling sad about my past and now, Lexi have done nothing but add fuel to the fire.
“Cleo, I swear I…” Gwen began but i didn’t even wait for her to talk finish when I ran out of the tent, ignoring her calls.
Now I understand why I can’t mention my first love name…the heartbreak, the pain, the humiliation, the rejection, the scar was still there.
I thought I’ve forgotten all of those shit but no, I haven’t.
The memory still felt like yesterday.
I was stupid to think that I had moved on.
⏮️ FLASHBACK⏮️
“What is she talking about?” Her friends asked, giving me those weird look.
“I…what did you just say?” She asked me, raising a questioning brow at me.
I was fiddling with my fingers now, hoping she won’t embarras-sme publicly. We were at the school hall and apparently most of the students were here.
“I…Can we speak in private?” I asked in a low voice.
“Say whatever you have to say here.” She said coldly, glaring ha-rd at me.
I swallowed nothing as I started moving from one foot to the other. “I…” I inhaled de-eply, trying to encourage myself.
Besides the least she can say is No and we will just go on with our lives, right?
By the way, she seem to like me too. The very first day I stepped foot in this school, she was the first friend I ever made. She treated me nicely and dealt with anyone that tries to bully me.
She wouldn’t hurt me in anyway even though she doesn’t feel the same for me.
I took few more de-ep breaths before opening my mouth to speak;
“I like you.”
The whole hall fell into de-ep silent.
All eyes were on me.
I can’t remember the last time I prayed to God because right now I find myself praying for the ground to open and swallow me up.
She blinked once, blinked twice then lastly blinked thrice…it was still very quiet until she and her friends burst into laughter.
They laughed and laughed even to the stage of shedding tears from the laughter.
And just like that everyone joined them and started laughing as well.
I was confused.
Did I say anything funny?
Minutes later the laughter died down and she cleared her throat, waving her hand to someone.
A guy walked down to us and before I knew what was going on, they were both making out in front of everyone…no, in front of me.
She mo-an-ed loudly, ki-ssing him as ha-rd as he was ki-ssing her…this was a warning…am obvious message pa-ssed on to me that she was straight and not g-ay.
At least she didn’t say any hurtful words. I turned to leave but oh boy, I’ve been so wrong about her all this while.
“Don’t you have any shame?” She asked me. I turned to look at her. She has stopped making out with the guy but he was still standing beside her. “What gave you the audacity, the courage to walk down here and say that bullshit to me?” She asked.
Everyone were looking at us.
I was dying of embarra-ssment and shame now.
I was mentally begging her to stop talking and just walk away.
Besides she have make her point clear of not being g-ay by ki-ssing this guy and I’m fine with it.
“You pathetic cheap g-ay.” One of her friends said coldly, eyeing me from head to toe.
Normally, she wouldn’t let her friends speak ill of me this way but right now she didn’t care about the harsh words or look I receive from people.
I wasn’t even hurt by their words or stares…I was hurt by her words.
“Simply because I was nice and friendly to you doesn’t mean I have any goddamn feelings for you. Everything I did for you was out of pity and nothing else. I am straight and not g-ay like you,” She scrunched up her face in disgust. “You should be ashamed of yourself right now. People like your kind shouldn’t be free in this world because you will go about condemning the world!” She said angrily.
Her words were breaking me into pieces. They were shattering me. I felt broken, ashamed, scared…my emotions were just so complex and confusing.
She shouldn’t be saying all of this. A simple no would have done the magic and everything will just go back to normal.
But no, she kept escalating the whole matter, making me feel like garbage.
I couldn’t even defend myself. I was weak to fight back. Actually, I wasn’t weak or scared to fight back…I was hurt to fight back.
⏭️ FLASHBACK ENDS⏭️
I sat down under a huge tree as I hug-ged my knees against my chest and continued crying.
The pain was still there. I left the school but the pain never left me.
I cried and cried, my heart were broken into a billion pieces. Over and over again.
Why me?
Why can’t I be happy?
Why can’t I be loved?
Why can’t it be me!? Like come on! Was I curse or something?
I was sobbing uncontrollably. My chest were hurting but that did nothing to stop me from crying.
“Cleo,” A voice called from behind as someone placed their hand on my shoulder. “I’m sorry.”
I knew it was Gwendolyn but I still didn’t stop crying.
Funny enough I wasn’t even crying because of what I saw in the tent of Gwen and Lexi ki-ssing but I was crying because of my failed love life. I was crying because of her…my first love. The girl whose words were like a bullet stuck in my heart. No amount of surgery can take out the painful bullet.
Gwen sat down beside me, squeezing my shoulder gently. “I’m very sorry. It was stupid of me to have ki-ssed her back. I wasn’t thinking straight….I didn’t even know what I was doing… I…”
“Do you love her?” I cut her off by asking her the simple and yet difficult question. She didn’t say anything. I sniffled, turning to see a better view of her. “You ki-ssed her back and that means two things; either you love her back or you want her.”
“That’s the same thing.” She reasoned out.
“Exactly. So tell me, do you?”
She shook her head calmly then shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“What exactly do you feel when she’s around? What were your thought when she ki-ssed you?”
For the first time ever I saw the nervousness in her beautiful gray eyes.
“Gwen?” I called out, reaching out to hold her hand. “Talk to me…as a sister.” I said almost pleadingly. Her reply was all I need to take a decision for myself.
She lowered her gaze then slowly brou-ght them up to look at me in the eyes. She finally opened her mouth to speak, “I liked it.”
“You liked what?” I knew what she was talking about but I still expected her to say the words herself.
She ran her tongue over her li-ps, letting off a de-ep breath. “I liked the ki-ss. I didn’t want her to stop…God, I felt so free. I felt so alive, happy and….” She suddenly stopped talking.
“Why did you stop talking?”
“I’m sorry. You like Alex and I shouldn’t be feeling this way towards her as well.”
“Gwen, this isn’t about me. Please just say whatever you have in mind. Talk to me. And I promise to listen without judging or hating you.”
She hesitate for a while then continued, “The ki-ss was just…sweet. I never wanted her to stop. I wanted more and more.” She gasped, her eyes growing wide. “Cleo, do you think I like Alex?”
“Judging by the feelings you described… I think you do like Lexi.” I said in a low voice.
She started shaking her head. “No. No way. I’m not g-ay. I can’t be g-ay.” She said repeatedly looking very scared.
“Why not? Do you detest g-ays also? Are we disgusting garbage to you as well?”
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????Brenden’s pov????
“What was the meaning of that!?” I yelled at the top of my voice in anger, shooting daggers at my sister who looked very relaxed and less afraid.
She folded her arms over her chest. “What are you talking about?”
“You know just what I’m talking about, Lexi.”
“I do?” She dramatically tapped her finger on her chin, pretending to be in thought. “I don’t think i know what you are talking about, dear big brother.”
“Lexi, what has come over you!?” I asked her angrily. “Why are you behaving this way right now?”
I was confuse of the whole situation right now. Why was she being this cold and mean towards me?
First, it was at the field. The way she was continually shooting me with anger laced in her eyes were so scaring and surprising. Lexi would never do anything to hurt me. Never. But earlier today at the field, she was just looking so different and scary. Secondly, I caught her ki-ssing Gwen. Last thing I remember, they both aren’t g-ay…okay, i might not be so sure about Gwen but I hope she wasn’t g-ay but I’m very sure of Lexi. She loves and care for that boyfriend of hers so what’s all this now?
She started laughing, “Behaving this way? What way exactly?”
“This way.” I gestured at her nonchalant behavior.
“Is that really what you want to know?” She raised a questioning brow at me. “Let’s make a deal, shall we?” She stepped closer towards me. “You only get to ask me one question and I promise to give you an honest answer, deal?”
I have a lot of question to ask her but I was mostly curious about one question. And it will kill me if I don’t find an answer to it.
“Why were you ki-ssing Gwen?”
She smirked. “I knew that was the question you were going to ask. Not surprise.” She sighed. “I think it’s time I fulfil my own part of the deal by being honest.” She paused. “I like her.”
My eyes were bulging out in shock. “What?”
“I said I like…”
“I know what you said but how…when…why…Wait, you are g-ay?”
“Apparently I am. And it’s Gwen that I love and want.”
No. this can’t be happening. Lexi can’t be in love with Gwen. She definitely can’t be. I mean, she loves that boyfriend of hers and will do anything for him.
As if reading my mind, she added. “I never felt anything for Rowan. It was just an experiment to me. Though our feelings are mutual…he used me and i used him also.”
“He used you?” I repeated.
“Stop playing dumb. I know about what transpired between you, Rowan and Lena.” She glared. “Rowan only dated me to take revenge on you. And you, you knew about it but didn’t tell me anything. How could you call yourself my brother when you can’t even look out for me!?”
“I tried talking you out into dating him but you refused to listen. You claimed to be in love with him…what do you have me to do?”
“Nothing.” She answered with a shrug. “And that’s why I expect the same thing from you right now. Do nothing about Gwen and I and just stay away!”
“I…” I shook my head. “i can’t.”
She furrowed her brows. “what?”
I’m in love with Gwendolyn…I can’t see myself losing her.
“I’m in love with Gwendolyn.” I confessed before I could even stop myself.
Lexi didn’t even act surprise or anything which means only one thing; she knows about my feelings for Gwen and still went ahead to ki-ss her!
How could she do something as hurtful and mean as this?
“I’m also in love with her and she already knows about my feelings for her. I won’t let you,” She pointed her index finger at me warningly. “come in between Gwen and I. I will do anything to keep her even if it means hurting you…i will.” she walked past me but i stopped her.
“Lexi,” She turned to look at me. “I won’t lose Gwen to you also. I will do anything to keep her but I promise to make things right between you and I.”
“No luck with that, dear big brother. And also, it’s not up to you to decide who be With Gwen… The decision lies in her hands.” With that she walked out, leaving me in total confusion.
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????Cleo’s pov????
“What? No! Why will you even say a thing like that?” She asked me.
“Why wouldn’t I?” I fired back.
She let out a de-ep breath, running her fingers throu-ghher hair. “I don’t hate g-ays, Cleo. I just…I can’t be g-ay.”
“Why not?”
“I can’t let my mother’s perception to be confirmed right! I can’t be g-ay.” She said.
“But you like Lexi.” I pointed out.
“I won’t deny that I feel something for her and I haven’t felt that way towards anyone before but…”
“Brenden,”
“What?”
“What about Brenden? Where does he stand in all of this?” I questioned.
She opened her mouth but closed it, she opened it again and still closed it,,,it went in and on like that until she finally said.
“Actually what I feel for Alex is exactly what I feel for Brenden.” She gulped hard, fiddling with her fingers now. Something she has never done before. “He might be annoying, frustrating, arrogant, a complete jackas-sbut,” She raised her gaze to look at me. “When I ki-ssed him I felt the spark. It was exactly what I felt for Alex when I ki-ssed her.” She paused. “Does that mean I like Brenden also?”
“Oh no. This isn’t good.”
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????Alexis’s pov????
That psychotic bastard!
How can he confess to me about loving Gwen?
I’m not surprise though but how could he still say it to my face even when I told him about feeling the same way for her!?
I won’t let him win this time around.
He has mom by his side so I definitely won’t let him have his way with Gwendolyn. Never.
I came out of the tent and saw everyone around the bonfire playing a game.
I searched around for one particular person and when I found her, I quickly rushed down to her.
“Follow me.” I whispered in her ear then walked away.
*****
“What’s going on?” She asked me, folding her arms over her chest.
“You should be doing your own part of the deal instead of playing stupid games like that!” I spatted coldly.
She roll her eyes. “I couldn’t find him around.” She studied me careful. “You did your own part, huh?”
“I’m desperate here, Lena. And if you want to win Brenden’s heart then you should start being more like me.”
Lena laughed. “Listen carefully, I’m worse than you so stop trying to be in control, okay? You want Gwen and i want Brenden. You need me to win Gwen’s heart and i need you to win Brenden’s heart so stop acting like the boss here.”
Okay, she isn’t wrong there.
“Yeah. whatever.” I just brush it off. “You need to do your own part of the deal.”
She nods. “I know. But you know, I don’t want to rush things.”
“What do you mean?”
She smirked. “I want to work with time, Lexi. There’s got to be a perfect timing for me to strike. They say; ‘The hunter who is patient enough to target his prey never miss it.’”
“Who said that?” I asked.
she shrugged. “I don’t know.”
“But you just said they say…”
She gro-aned. “Then let’s just leave it that way.” She paused. “You’ve done your part, right? Now wait while I do mine.” She winked.
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????Gwen’s pov????
What’s wrong with me?
I’ve never been this confuse, scared or nervous about anything until now.
How can I have feelings for two siblings? Not just any siblings but a boy and a girl.
Was I straight or g-ay? Where the hell do I belong exactly?
I enjoyed the ki-ss I shared with Brenden that other day and now I enjoyed the ki-ss I shared with Alex.
Crazy, right?
Even Cleo was as confuse as i am.
I thought she would be mad at me and probably hate me but no, she was rather very concern and worried about me.
She asked me to look de-eply into my heart and figure out my answers…if only that was possible.
I’ve never been in love. Hell, I don’t even know what love means but here I am thinking about two siblings I might probably be in love with.
But come to think of it,,,I think there’s no need for me to panic. Alex already told me about her feelings and if I’m ready to be g-ay then our feelings for each other are mutual but Brenden? He’s a playboy who obviously doesn’t believe in love. He definitely only wants me for s** and nothing more or less.
I shouldn’t get confused about this,,, Alex loves me but Brenden doesn’t.
I was walking down a narrow path. Cleo had left earlier to join the rest of the students while I chose to stay back and think about my life.
I was so de-ep in thought that i didn’t hear anyone’s footstep until I felt their hand on my shoulder, almost startling me.
I turned around to find Brenden staring down at me with a sad look on his face.
Speaking about Brenden, I totally forgot about the situation he had found me with his sister.
“Hey,” I greeted in a low voice. “What are you…?” He quickly cuts me off.
“I won’t let go of you,”
“What?”
He stepped closer towards me and cupped my face in between his palms. “I won’t let Lexi win this time around.”
“What are you saying?” My voice was inaudible, I won’t be surprise if he didn’t hear me clearly.
He ran his thumb over my li-ps, bringing his forehead against mine and took in a de-ep breath. “Gwen,” He called me so calmly. I’ve never seen Brenden behave this way towards me. He was acting very sweet and gentle and truth be told it was scaring the shit out of me.
I hope it’s not what I’m thinking. I hope he wasn’t going to say the word…
“I’m in love with you.”
Oh shit! He said the word.
I take back my word, there’s need for me to panic.
“Brenden…” I began but he cut me off by smashing his li-ps against mine.
Oh boy, I’ve ki-ssed two siblings just in a day…This is so Fuc-ked up!
****To Be Continued****