EPISODE TWENTY-EIGHT
I put a call throu-gh to Janet and asked her to
meet me so we can talk. I’m really curious
about what she said we have to discuss and I
hope it’s not what will jeopardize my journey
with Funmi. She did come and we went to a
remote place to talk. Only God knows what the
matter is that is this serious. Here we go. . .
Me: Thanks for the calls Janet, I really . . .
Janet: You are welcome sweetheart. How is
mum?
Me: (She just called me sweetheart, well that’s
not new but she also called my mother mum,
that’s new) She’s fine thanks. You said we
have serious issue to discuss, hope all is well?
Janet: We are fine Will, I’m just happy to see
you.
Me: I’m happy to see you too, but how do you
mean we are fine?
Janet: (Smiles) Firstly I want to apologize to
you for not being truthful and open.
Me: (Okay, the matter has started) Hmm, so
you never love me, you were just pla-ying with
my br@in (I was praying she’ll say “No, I never
love you”)
Janet: Far from that. I love you so much, and I
still do.
Me: (Oh God, why now. Don’t love me, ah!) So
why are you sorry?
Janet: I never told you I was in a serious
relationsh!p. I have a fiancée
Me: (That’s a little relief) At last Janet. Why
are you just admitting it now?
Janet: It wasn’t easy for me Will. I really love
you and my fiancée was always giving me
reason to love you more, by breaking our
communication and you were always in reach.
Imagine we only spoke once throu-ghout last
month. As much as I love him, I felt I’m losing
him so I had to protect myself. That’s why I
sound so desperate. It’s because I didn’t want
to lose at both ends and it’s the reason I told
you no that time.
Me: I think I un-derstand now. I’m sorry about
your relationsh!pbut it could be he’s always
busy.
Janet: Yes, that’s always the excuse, but I got
tired of it last two weeks and broke up with
him and then he suddenly find time to call me
every day.
Me: Hmm, why don’t you forgive him (I have
to push that line so she can let me be)
Janet: Do I have option, when almost all his
family members were begging me.
Me: (It’s turning to good news gradually) His
whole family?
Janet: Close to that. At least I receive his
mum’s call every day now.
Me: Oh! It’s good the mother like you
Janet: Yes, I love that fact too. We’ll be
having our introduction next month, he’s
coming home
Me: (Finally brethren, a good news) Wao!
That’s cool. Congratulations (In my heart I am
dancing and singing thank you Lord, “mobo”)
Janet: Thanks Will. I’m sorry about how I’ve
always been to you. I really do like you and
wish I can be your woman. Sometimes I wish I
could have it all
Me: (If this is a dream, nob©dy should dare
wake me up) I like you too Jane. I really do,
but I hate to snatch someb©dy’s babe.
Janet: Can we still be good friends with no
strings attached?
Me: (All strings thrown into the ocean with the
Egyptians) Are you asking that? I’m going to
be at your wedding dancing like a crazy dude
Janet: (We both laughed) Thanks Will, you are
a nice guy
Me: Noooo, I’m not nice. I preferred to be call
good and cool.
Janet: Funny. You are a good guy
Me: Perfect if you add cool to it. So how do
we celebr@te your introduction?
That was how I got saved from Janet’s claw,
at least according to her words. The beauty of
the whole situation was that we were both
happy at the end. She got her man fully back
and I got Funmi. Wait! I mean I got to woo
Funmi alone and I’m going to do that
tomorrow before I go to Aramide’s side. I
better get my girl before they turn my mood
upside down.
The funny thing is I really don’t un-derstand
what’s going on, neither do I really believe
Janet. It looks more like a script pl@ythan
realty to me. How can someb©dy who was on
my n£¢k last two weeks, if not for exams,
suddenly change in a dramatic fashion like
this. Until I see her introduction pictures, I’m
going to be careful of her. Truth is the
situation is a little scary to me. Adding the
misery that she held my hand from our
conversation sp©t down to her lodge where
she gave me a ro-mantic hvg, capping it with a
k!ssor you say pe-ck but very close to my
mouth. I have reason to be scared.
I got home to meet Adesewa who was alre-ady
in our room. Sometimes it’s funny how you’ll
be in the same school and level with
someb©dy and you’ve never sighted each other
before, for 5years. If I had seen Sewa before,
then the picture has obviously been erased
from my data bank. She’s tall and beautiful,
almost of the same height as Dan. Her smile
keeps creating bubbles of love all around the
room. She reminded me of no other person
than Funmi. How was I really distracted from
Funmi? She’s cool, down to earth, not proud
and obviously got something for a financially
average guy in me. What the hell is wrong
with me? If I lose this lady, I might regret it
every day.
I got lost in this thought and didn’t even know
my phone was ringing. It was like I’m
daydreaming.
Temmy: (Shouted on t©p of his voice) William
what’s wrong with you? Can’t you hear your
phone ringing?
Me: (Back to consciousness. I checked the
phone and it’s Funmi, but the call was missed
before I could pick it.) I sincerely do not hear
it ring.
Temmy: What happened where you went to?
Hope all is well?
Me: All is mysteriously well or should I say
mythically well.
Temmy: Hmm, I guess we’ll talk later
Me: Sure bro. Hello guys, is this my in-law to
be? (Facing Adesewa)
Dan: Janet, meet my brother. We were born
the same day
Sewa: You were the one speaking to me on
phone right?
Me: They just told me I’m the one, I myself did
not know (We all laughed). How are you
doing?
Sewa: I’m great. Thanks for the call. If not for
you I wouldn’t have picked his call.
Me: The plea-sure is mine and I could see why
Dan can’t get his mind off you. I bow for your
royal beauty, your majesty (I bend my head
down in Ko-rean style)
Sewa: (Smiling) Thanks a lot.
Me: Don’t give my brother the silent treatment
again o, you nearly kill him. We are almost
going to hire search p@rty, just to locate you.
Sewa: Don’t mind him. He knew what he did
and how he can resolve it but was forming
ha-rd .
Dan: Common baby, I did but you still were
not picking up
Sewa: Leave me jor (She used her hand to
cover his mouth)
Me: Well you now have someb©dy you can
report his head to. Tell me he did ru-bbish and
I’ll kick bu-tt
We all laughed and continue chatting till my
phone rang again from the same person and I
excused my self
Me: Hello Funmi
Funmi: Why are you not picking my calls, was
it because I did not pick earlier.
Me: No, I wanted to pick it but. . .
Funmi: I wasn’t with my phone that time and
you didn’t even bother to try again
Me: Funmi you are angry
Funmi: Yes I am very angry
Me: Cool down. I’m sorry okay
Funmi: When are you coming to my side?
Me: Tomorrow morning
Funmi: Too far, too late
Me: It’s alre-ady late. I can’t make it back on
time if I come this evening.
Funmi: You’ll go back with my car
Me: What if I give you the whole of tomorrow.
Funmi: Whole of tomorrow?
Me: Yeah, we’ll be together throu-ghout. I want
you to follow me somewhere
Funmi: I’ll agree on one condition
Me: Which is?
Funmi: That you’ll have breakfast here, before
9am.
Me: Done!
Funmi: Good bye.
The way she put her words can only make you
love her more. I rose up earlier the following
morning, had my bath and set to leave. Dan
offered I go with his jeep but I declined
because her babe might see it and make funny
comments to her friends like, “that’s my
b©yfri£nd’s car he’s ri-ding”. I don’t trust lady
in that regard, because I don’t think they see
it as wrong. I received a call from Aramide
that morning before I stepped out.
Aramide: Hi Will
Me: Good morning. How are you?
Aramide: I’m fine and you?
Me: I’m good, what’s up?
Aramide: I’ll s£nd the description to you now.
You can come later in the evening. There is
someb©dy I want you to meet.
Me: Who is the person?
Aramide: When you come, you’ll know the
person
Me: I’ve been getting a lot of that of recent
but I’m not sure I want to go throu-gh it again.
Aramide: Common Will, it’s someb©dy you’ll
love to meet. I promise you won’t regret it
Me: It’s not about regret; it’s about how it
will affect me
Aramide: Don’t worry will. Just come
Me: Give me a specific time
Aramide: 4pm would be okay
Me: Alright, can I come with someb©dy?
Aramide: Who are you coming with, Funmi?
I’ll prefer you come with her.
Me: (Is this girl a witch, how can she guess?)
There is something between you and Funmi.
Anyway see you in the evening.
I got off the call with her and headed to
Funmi’s place. Entering throu-gh their gate I
met with the devil and it was then I
remembered my prayer that morning was too
short. I tried avoiding her but you know devil
will always be devil.
Uche: Will, here you are.
Me: Uche Uche, how are you?
Uche: Don’t Uche me. You promised you’ll
come for the p@rty but you did not show up.
Me: And I can’t remember receiving your call
asking me why. Anyway, I was there in spirit.
If you were in spirit you would have seen me.
Uche: Who asked for your spirit to come? You
really offend and it’s not good.
Me: Don’t be offended, I had to travel that
day. It was urgent
Uche: So how will you make it up to me?
Me: I’ve said I’m sorry now.
Uche: I know but you have to make it up to
me
Me: (I check the term and it’s few minutes to
9am. Damn! Why must it always be Uche
whenever I want to do something like this?)
Okay what do you want?
Uche: There is a p@rty in my lodge today. It’s
organized for the final year students of my
hostel. Come to the p@rty and I won’t be angry
again.
Me: When is the p@rty?
Uche: 10pm till mama calls
Me: Night p@rty? I went to a day p@rty and I
was “planked”, now you want me to go to a
night p@rty? Choose another thing.
Uche: It will be fun. Everyb©dy in this hostel is
coming
Me: What’s my own with that?
Uche: Including your rich friend you are
visiting.
Me: What’s your own about who I come to
visit?
Uche: Will you are a bad boy! You have Janet
and you are still coming here to meet another
babe
Me: Who told you I’m d@t!ngJanet. You better
go and do your homework. Aproko.
Uche: I will be expecting you o.
Me: You better choose another thing because
no supervisor can f0rç£ me down this time
around.
Uche: You will see. I’ll make sure you come
and by the way, you might really nee-d a plank
or receive one this morning because your rich
girlfriend’s b©yfri£ndsle-pt over and he’s still
there.
Me: Uche bye. What’s your concern?
Uche: Bring wine o
I left her there before she’ll spoil my mood. I
knocked at Funmi’s door and nob©dy
answered. I felt the music being pla-yed so
loudly was the reason why she could not hear
my knock. Come to think of it, loud music is
unlike Funmi, she’s the quiet type. Something
is definitely not right. I ban-ged the door again
and an angry male voice responded from the
inside. He lowered the music and opened the
door. Lo and behold, it’s that new guy she
was following around.
Guy: Good morning, plea-se come in.
Me: (How come he change his tone and
expression seeing me) plea-se where is Funmi?
Guy: She’s in the bathroom
Me: plea-se tell her I come by. Thank you.
I left the place before the guy could make any
comment
Perfect rejection episode 28
