Beyond captivating
By Op. Amina
Episode 46
Celine POV:
“Nigel listen” I call to him softly as he packed my things into a small bag but he ignored.
After we said our goodbyes to the doctor he walked towards his car and opened the door to the drive ….
He hadn’t bothered to open the door for me ,, but I do not mind at all …
I settled down gently while i hook on my seat belt …
My eyes was following his movement, my heart keep pounding as I study him …he was a very good looking man what else was I looking for …
immediately he turn his face to hook on his belt
My fears multi-plied in an hundred fold when I saw the rage and hurt in his eyes, i knew all he so wanted was to scold me, crush me, pounce on me for everything but yet he chooses to stay quiet, Nigel isn’t the type that show his emotions throu-gh words though, but I had expected more cruel rage from him after finding out I sle-pt with nate too,,,
I knew he was thinking, he was hurt and in so much pain, i knew he was now completely convinced that I was a bit-ch, one who betrayed her loved ones to suit her purposes but I so desperately wanted to reas-sure him, wanted him to know I consider him as my future …and my life now …
I wanted nothing but a second chance from him and I swear I will fix things back..
i swallowed the ti-ghtness in my throat when i thought of how i had used him right from the beginning of it all, how I nearly go crazy cause of Lucas …how was he suppose to feel …
I had misled my self for my selfish reasons and I had brou-ght him into my $h!t, I had sle-pt with both Lucas and him including that gold digger nate…, i had betrayed my friends, i had lied to them all…
How horrible am i !
Irritation over the pains I caused everyone brou-ght tears to my eyes .. I felt guilty and I should have died,
I deserve to die
“am sorry baby” I said soberly immediately he st©pped on the traffic light but he said nothing..
I lowered my head ,,afraid to look at him, afraid of what he’d say if I pressurised him further, i was afraid of his silence …how was i suppose to know what he was thinking when he wouldn’t even talk….my voice trembled slightly and paused long enough to regain control, I decided to try again
“Nigel am……”
“I’ll tell you when to speak Celine, for Christ sake for now just,….”
He closed his eyes for a moment before cutting on the words gently
“Just shut it”
The harshness in his voice made me froze, but I nee-d him to forgive me, I love him and I nee-d him now more than ever…,I shifted on my seat and trembled more….my heart was beating so ha-rd I could actually feel the fabric of my dress moving against me.
When I stare back at him this time…
My eyes went hvge when I saw his red teary eyes…
“My love plea-se, I regret having tricked you from the beginning, but my feelings are true now…I …love …you”
“Damn it ” i shuddered as he hits his fist on the steering wheel before shouting
“Don’t you get it Celine, told you to shut your mouth, and don’t you dare say a word,”
I knew he had been hiding the rage, probably he do not want to cause a scene at the hospital..but now seeing how truly angry he was made me realise I lost all possible chance with him, he was re-ady to take me back …but who would do such after finding out I also sle-pt with nate ..
After finding out Jamie father was his best friend and how I was totally involved in the whole mess
I bit myl-ips and for a moment my hand c@m£ up to my ban-ging head,
I was totally crushed by his sight
Tears trickle down my face when I saw how he was struggling to hold back his tears, immediately he met with my teary eyes he was quic-k to wipe off the ones coming out before pressing on the gear.
Nigel my love, am sorry I caused you so much pains I so wanted to say that right now but I couldn’t,,
I turn slowly
With my eyes glued to the roadway but seeing nothing, i steadfastly avoided looking at him as more of my tears fall,
I was concentrating only on the knot of my stomach .. . stilling the trembling of my lim-bs
. Focusing on the ban-gs on my head, the sounds of my heart and the heat on my skin …
When he pu-ll-ed into
his villa i took a de-ep breath and sat back on my seat …
he drove slowly towards the garage before st©pping the car ….
He pu-ll off his seat belt and gr@bb£d my hospital bag.
He was about moving out when he st©pped …I froze on my seat as I stare at him …
“Get down, you nee-d to eat something and take your drugs, cause the fas-ter you get better, the earlier we get back to Capetown” he said without meeting with my eye
No more than that, he opened the door and headed inside, my heart dropped when I realise he hadn’t bothered to glance back to look at me …, I got down and moved slowly towards the entrance…
The villa was indeed a very beautiful place….. a majestical live oak shaded the entire front of the house with curly grey moss dripping from its br@nched,
the tiled roof was currently showing the morning sun, scarlet and profuse were blooming in a terracotta pots on each sides of the front door, the whole buildings was built in wings that form a horse shoe around the center, at a much farther direction there were pools, trees, gardens , flowers and much more , ma-king the whole surroundings so quiet and lovely …
This was exactly his taste ,, quietness and peace ,, but I had deprive him of that ever since i c@m£ into his life..
I climbe-d the step slowly only to notice my blood wasn’t anywhere around anymore ,, probably he might have paid someone to do that
I opened the door slowly and entered,
He wasn’t any where around though, but the whole place looks so big and cool
My sad and lonely heart had given me time to look around…. the living room was designed in a Mexicans structure, larger with skylights overhead which currently brou-ght in the light of the beautiful morning.
The furniture were all neatly arranged all done in a similarly masculine style though their color scheme leaned toward browns and blue against the basic white walls and tiles.
How many be-drooms was unknown but a large kitchen was right behind at a farther direction, all glistening and designed in a decent settings …
With a towel around his n£¢k he c@m£ back wearing a tan coloured p@n-ts with a dark green shi-t opened to his mid che-st, he looked clean , fresh and smell like a man and after shave,..
He met with my eyes but wouldn’t even say a word …I saw him moved towards the kitchen before i took my seat on the sofa,I l@ymy head back..
When I heard my name my heart skipped…almost immediately I turn back to stare at him ..
He was arranging some plates and pots on the table probably he wanted to prepare something …he wasn’t looking at me when he spoke though …
“You should go have your bath, walk throu-gh the second corridor to the left ,, that’s your room,”
He cleared his tone, I alre-ady arranged what you might nee-d including some sanitary ….
He cleared his tone again …
“Sanitary pads,”
I nodded while I cleared the tears on my face
“Thanks Nigel” I said weakly before moving and finding my way to the room, I opened the door gently and entered
The be-droom was a museum clean, a large king size be-d sat elegantly with beautiful curtains, be-d spre-ads and covers with few artistic drawings hanged at the corners of the walls
I slide open the closet door, all of my cloths were alre-ady neatly hanged ..
And in the bathroom I saw the views of comb, shampoo, brush, hairdryer, lotions, towels and all
I went back to the room and dejectedly lower myself to the edge of the be-d, your room and not our room …
Is he really planning on staying far away from me until we get back to cape town
I deserved this torture …even if he brou-ght a woman right in here, I deserved it …
After shower I made my way back …
Like I knew this is gonna happen I was shocked, when I saw a young lady sitting elegantly with her legs crossed together while Nigel served her something like sandwiches, tea and toast …
My heart drown when I saw the smile on his face while he c*ressed her hair
I trembled with tears and heart break …
I had never for once seen a lady with Nigel ever since we’ve been together,
This was the first time and I felt my Heart wrecking ap@rt ..
Without saying a word I was about turning back when I heard his voice..
“You should join us Celine, your food is set too”
I cleared the tears on my face quic-kly before walking towards them …
Immediately I set my foot on the dinning room
I smile at the lady who wouldn’t be older than twenty three before taking my seat,
“Hi” she smile at me
“Celine meet Mona,”
“Mona, Celine,” he gestured
“Nice meeting you Celine” Mona stretched her hand,
My hands trembled and my eyes ti-ght£ñed when I glance down at her hand, with f0rç£, I took her hand before squee-zing a smile …
“Nice meeting you too Mona ”
I took my fork without meeting with Nigel eyes, I knew he was staring at me, watching my trembling hands, my charade of trying to steady them and the tears threatening to explode, but I manage to bit into some slide of toast to hold them, scooped a bite of eggs into my mouth as I reached for a glas-s of orange jui-ce …
It was difficult to swallow as my hand clenched the glas-s of jui-ce I glanced up only to realise Mona eyes was on me …
“Why are you sweating, thought the air conditioner is on,”
She turn her face to Nigel’s who concentrated on the food he was eating…
“Nigel, she is sweating, look at her ” she called again
“No” I cut her words before squee-zing a smile …
“I just …..I ….mean….I…..just finished bathing, its the water from my hair ”
“Oh I see” she study me for a moment before staring back at Nigel
I concentrated back on my food, Nigel wasn’t saying a word as I had expected…. immediately she laughed I glanced up only to see her reaching a spoon towards Nigel who took it with a smile on his face,
I couldn’t take it anymore as I watched the two talking and smiling as if I never existed,,
It was such a pain to my heart,, cause all I felt was pity for myself instead of jealousy ..
I was glad he was showing me how it feels, the pains, the heavy heart, the jealousy and the sadness of admiring someone else like I had did to him,
The moment Mona lean closer to k!sshim, tears trickle down my face,
The whole atmosphere felt as if I was being staged in hell, I couldn’t even move my legs, I was glued, just staring at them with my chin propped in my hands and my elbow on the table while I shook my folk on my toast …
I was lost, wishing I should have died instead …
I glanced up the moment I felt his shadow fell on me,
He slide a white handkerchief towards me and the drugs I guess the doctor might have given him on my behalf,
“You are to take two of each, you’ve got to get better fast …” He gave me a reminding look before taking Mona’s hand while they led them selves outside …
The moment they closed the door behind them, my kneels gave out on me while I cried, I was surprised the crying didn’t hurt, it didn’t even make me sad at least not any sadder than I alre-ady was ,, but I couldn’t st©p…
It gave me the reminder that you shouldn’t hurt the people that loves you with all of their heart, both Nigel and Silvia had loved me beyond imagination but i scre-wed it all …
Wherever Nigel and Mona had gone to I wasn’t sure but I had spent the day in be-d, a box of tissues and garbage pail next to me, the box ra-pidly emptying and the pail filling with we-t tissues,,
my eyes had gotten all swollen by non st©p tears, I tried pinching my nose, closing my eyes, or maybe get a nap, just lying down or sitting up, jogging in place or even standing precariously on my head …
I tried meditation but couldn’t concentrate cause I kept getting we-t ..
“How do I get it to st©p,”my mind and heart battled
I can’t spend my whole life weeping, I got to split the truth to Silvia, I know I lost Nigel, and so soon am gonna loose Silvia friendsh!ptoo, but I got to clear my heart and live with this guilt forever,, it was my confinement, my faith cause I had written it my self and I had to live with the mess..
Glad I finally fell asleep with the pillows wra-pped on my che-st as my tears continue to fall drenching the be-d with salty liquid that warmed me throu-gh the hours of not seeing Nigel ,,
In my dreams I flared in an azure sea, birds froli-cked around me and the sun showed throu-gh the water so I could see the sandy bottom, I was alone except for the birds, but its so strange cause I didn’t feel so lonely but rather safe ..
my tears began to evaporate from the blankets and pillow as I dreamed. Forming a green mist around my b©dy, the mist were warm as I smile to the birds and sunk dee-per into sleep …my tears slowed immediately i sat back on the shore just watching the birds as they flew …i smile and glanced sideways but shuddered immediately I saw Silvia teary face racing towards my direction I squee-zed my eyes shut while I struggled with my breath …
the other direction I saw Lucas all wanting to st©p whatever Silvia wanted to do …
I stood in fear at the rage on Silvia’s face,
“Silvia plea-seee” Lucas shouted
immediately he gave Lucas this terrifying b!ow that made him went flying into the sea, I stood and raced with fear
While I plead with her …
“Silvia plea-seee, am sorry plea-se” I screamed
But whatsoever attack she’s about s£nding towards my way was struck on Nigel’s who he flew like a bat along with Lucas who was struggling to come out of the sea,
My eyes went hvge when she raced towards me like a wolf she gr@bb£d my n£¢k, her face was clouded with tears and red circles lounging around it,
She clenched her fist ha-rder with so much hatred while I cry …
“You betrayer, am gonna kill youuuuu”
She shouted
“Silvia plea-seeeeeee”
that was all I cried out as I jo-lt up from my sleep g@sping and patting as if it were just a few seconds for my life to be over …
I hold on to my ban-ging head while my tears fall …
I heard movement of foot steps and the next seconds the door to my room opened ,only to see Nigel and Mona hand in hand,
He gestured Mona to wait behind the door before he made his way in …
“You didn’t take your drugs Celine, what’s wrong with you, don’t you get it.
…… we nee-d to get back to cape town as soon as possible” he struck his eyes at me.
I stood up on trembling feet, stare at his scolding expression for a moment , before ma-king my way into the bathroom, after watching my face I retained on almost imperceptible memory of the dream before b!tt!g on myl-ips …it looked so real … …
God …
I made my way back but was st©pped when I saw him threw the drugs on the sofa beside the be-d and a cu-p of water on the stool …at the sight of that my heart fell
“Take those now,” he commanded…
With a ban-ging heart I stare at him, before moving towards the be-d
“Scold me Nigel, I know its about nate, and am sincerely sorry”
Hands inside his pocket he stare at me like he would stare at a thing …I realise he just had a newly hair cut and at that I can’t help but admire his whole ..
He was really, good looking..
With my heated face, I realise i was getting jealous of Mona
I took the drugs in my hands and stare up at him with tears locking in my eyes
“Is she your new girlfriend” I asked but
He remained silent instead and I decided not to pressurise him further, after ma-king sure I took the drug he moved towards the door ….
“They nee-d to know as soon as possible, so get well fast ”
“Nigel” I call to him
But shuddered when I heard the sound of the slammed door …
“oh Nigel, ” I cried softly with my face buried on my hands
********
The truth will be out soon don’t worry, I know some of you are eager alre-ady …but its a novel we gat to do things accordingly .
But it would be out soon sha…
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