đANGEL OF MINE đ
in-sert 20
âArenât we supposed to be calling her daughter-in law,â I heard her say from a distance.
âYou know what happened the last time she was in the City and Jamal is still in a comma,â he responded.
âI seriously donât know what to do anymore. She is getting worse and she nee-ds the best hospital. Right now she wonât be saved here, there is poor facility and they donât have the medicine,â she said.
They must have thought that I was slee-ping but I couldnât sleep because of my headache and it had gotten worse by the way not to forget to mention my wound which was on the leg and it wasnât healing at all. I had missed Jamal a lot, itâs been 3 weeks since I c@mÂŁ back and all I heard was that he was still in a comma. Right now I am not worried about myself, but my son. It hurts to know that I might not be able to see him again. Where would I see him? His wife chased me out of her house just after calling me a witch. I didnât poison her nor will I ever poison my son. I am not getting any eye shut and this has become a routine for me. I go to be-d early but I keep on tossing and turning on the be-d counting sheep. My husbandâs brother and his wife had taken me from my house, I am not feeling well and so they are taking care of me.
The wound could have healed by now but I donât know why itâs taking that long. I am also worried about my leg. With many thoughts running throu-gh my head, thinking that it maybe cancer or something serious. I am seriously scared to die before I see my Jamal. I wipe off the tear that escapes from my eyes. They have gone out and itâs just me and I in the room. I donât know what I did to deserve this. When I lost my husband without expecting it, I was de-eply hurt. But then do we predict our own deaths, no we donât. I wasnât re-ady; I didnât want him to leave me that early. I wanted him to grow old with me, I wanted him to watch our only child succeed in life but his life was short lived. I was left with Jamal and he was there to comfort me. He has always been there for me while other parents complained about their children; I always had something good to say about my own child. Jamal was a good boy from the start and I seriously didnât know how I was going to take care of him when I lost his father but he made things easier for me when just had to be more mature than his age. So you see why itâs so ha-rd for me to just sleep without knowing of my sonâs condition. It has always been about me and Jamal. Surely Emily could have just kicked me out in her house and I go live outside than to ma-king sure that I was out of the City. I wanted to call her and find out about Jamalâs condition but I st©pped when I thought of the possibility of her ignoring my calls. My heart bleeds right now as I pray to God to just make me see Jamal, he is all that I have in this world and I will be nothing without him. I am praying to God to make him survive this but my prayers are they that strong? I have not questioned God nor have I ever st©pped to think that he exists. I have seen wonders, things that He can do but what am I seeing when I am here at the village, not being able to see my son? I feel so useless right now and I just want to see Jamal.
âMaiguru, are you okay?â I heard her ask.
I didnât hear footsteps when she c@mÂŁ back inside, I must have been de-ep in my own thoughts. I wish I was okay. I was smiling and laughing out loud like itâs no oneâs business, I wish of so many things that could have brightened my days but I am just sad and lonely. My life isnât exciting anymore. I only live for Jamal and when things are like this, I donât feel well at all. I try to get up from the be-d since I was lying down and she helped me. I wince because of the pain coming from my leg. They have taken me to the hospital and I was given pills but they are not helping. I havenât been able to walk alone for days now, if it wasnât for these people who took me in, I would have probably died in my own home.
âI
am okay,â I lie to her.
I didnât want to be a burden; I didnât want them to worry about me anymore. Alre-ady they were extremely worried about my condition.
âEverything is going to be okay Maiguru, God will intervene.â
I wish he could just intervene sooner than later so that I can see Jamal. I wish he could just make some things seem possible. I want to see Jamal and that is my only wish for now. I really nee-d to see him.
âI miss Jamal.â
âI know and we all miss him.â
âTell me, how someone can be that cruel. I have never said anything bad about her but the way she hated me,â I sniffed, âI donât know what I did to her.â
âMaiguru, st©p stressing yourself. Once Jamal wakes up from that comma, he will come over here to see you. Right now we nee-d to find a way of ma-king sure that leg is completely healed, everything is going to be alright Maiguru.â
I
know she was trying to make me feel better but I had never st©pped thinking about Emily mistreatment. Honestly sometimes I used to have sleepless nights trying to thing where I had gone wrong with her. I used to cry praying to God if he could just make her love me. I guess my cries were not enough. I was more than hurt when she accused me of poisoning her. I know I have been talking about it several times, I have been mentioning the issue as well because up until now it hurts me a lot. You know being accused of something you are not capable of doing is heartbreaking. Itâs their words against yours. Right now I have got some people here at the village who are actually accusing me of being a witch. I donât know Emily might have talked to some people that she knew and told them that I had tried to kill her. I kept quiet one time at church when they were talking about mother-in laws mistreating their daughter-in laws, I felt as if the message was meant for me when the woman saying all sorts of things was looking at me.
Wiping off my tears for the last time, I decided to lie down back on the be-d. I wish I was helping them at the farm but because of my leg, I couldnât do anything. I only wished that I could get better and get the chance to see my Jamal.
*
I had sle-pt for just a few hours when I suddenly started feeling h0t. I was alone in the room and whilst trying to get up, I failed too. I gr@bbÂŁd the torch light that I had placed just beside me and switched it on. My leg was bleeding and that scared me a lot. I donât know if this was still an injury or it could have been something else. I had never missed my pills and I donât get it why they were not ma-king me feel better. I called out for Mai Chido and she c@mÂŁ in the room rushing. I had thought she was slee-ping,
âOh my God!â she exclaimed when she saw the mere sight of me bleeding.
âI canât get up.â
âLet me call Baba Chido,â she rushes out of the room and comes back later with her husband.
âWe
should take her to the clinic, I am sure we can find some nurses there,â said Baba Chido.
They agreed and right now they are going to use a scotch cart to take me to the clinic. I know going there is useless because there is absolutely nothing those people can do for me. It seems as if they had never seen something like that on my wound. I am in the scotch cart; my head is placed on Mai Chidoâs l@p. Baba Chido is walking on food leading the cows. Its dark outside and I feel so bad right now. I have become a burden in their lives and it could have been much easier if I had someone who was taking care of me.
âMaiguru, you are burning up,â she says after she had just placed her hand on my forehead, âBa Chido,â she calls out her husband and the scotch cart st©ps.â
âI have to see Jamal,â I say softly.
I feel like I am about to die and I canât die without seeing my son.
âI nee-d to see Jamal before I die,â I say weakly.
âMaiguru, you will not die,â she says between sobs, âBa Chido we wonât make it to the hospital, her b©dy is very h0t.â
Right now I feel worse than before, I canât breathe properly and I now hear their voices from a distant. I canât seem to get what they are saying and I donât see clearly. I am trying so ha-rd to open my eyes, but each time I do that I feel like shutting them again.
âMaiguru, can you hear me,â I can now hear her voice but there is this voice thatâs telling me to say goodbye to her.
âTell Jamal that I love him very much and that he should forgive Emily. I am sure she didnât mean to mistreat me. I could have wished to carry my grandchild 1 day but time is not on my side now.â
âMaiguru, plea-se donât say that.â
âMainini Mai Chido,â thank you very much.â
Now I feel like I want to rest and I try to keep my eyes wi-de open but then everything seemed getting dark in every pas-sing second until its dark with no sound and I take my last breath.
.
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