(My heart desire)
BY BLESSING SILVER
Leona clasped her legs together, tears rushed down her face and she whimpered as they fell, she shut her eyes, opened them, inhaled the neat air and stood upright, she walked to her car, hopped onto it and drove off. Greg had made her feel that vulnerability that she had felt when she let Toby have her, she couldn’t push it off and she didn’t like it.. That night flood into her head like a wave, the memory fresh like it just happened yesterday, slicing at her heart and clinging strongly to her mind, making her chest heavy.. She couldn’t believe she felt prey to it again.. She felt nauseated but she couldn’t throw up.
She was twenty then and it’s been two years already, a week to her graduation.. Just like Gregory, Toby had invited her after she had proposed her deal to him the way her father had asked her to, she went, having no doubt that he only invited her for business.. He offered her a drink, a drugged one and innocently she had taken it and he had persuade her to talk about the business even though he wasn’t interested in it.. Innocently she told him about it, trying her best to sound persuasive and professional, not until she started getting dizzy before realization hit her.. Her eyes were fluttering close and her eye balls wouldn’t stay on a direction, she felt like a jelly.. Toby emptied his drink and marched up to her, he lifted her up easily and dumped her on his bed, unlike Gregory, he lived alone in an extremely furnished self contain apartment.. Leona had tried to scream, to stop him from pulling her clothes but each step she took to help herself only left her more helpless and weak. She couldn’t fall asleep, Toby had only added a little sedative to make her weak and helpless while watching him have his way.. Leona couldn’t scream, couldn’t defend herself or fight him, she couldn’t do anything but watch him defile her..
He finished with her and sat on a couch, puffing smoke out of his mouth from a lit cigar..
“There,” he threw her a file “that’s the contract you need and don’t you think of reporting this cos it’ll be your loss in the end.. Your father’s broke and owes so much, I don’t think he can be able to jail me and again, I’ll make my dad take back the deal.. Your loss, twice. I bet you’ll do what’s wise” he said, puffing out smoke.. She could only stare at him scornfully, pain tearing all over her..
Leona felt liquid drop on her hand and realized that she had been crying, driving and had zoned out.. She stared at the free road, used a hand to wipe a part of her cheek, sniffed and continued driving..
Her supposed fun day just turned out to be a nightmare that she wished would never happen..
Leona got home and the maid told her her mom had gone out to get few things, Leona walked to her room, threw her things on the bed and stripped, she needed something to get her head off this awful night.. She stepped into the shower and let the water spread all over her nude body, she washed herself in a hard way, as if washing off all Greg’s touch, hoping it’d go and stop giving her memories.. She rested on the wall and sighed out, water strolling down her back and face, stopping her tears from coming out.. Leona stepped out of the shower, a towel wrapped up to her chest.. She stepped into her closet, grabbed her nightwear and pulled into them, she dried her hair, grabbed her phone and slipped her feet into her slippers before stepping out.. She followed the glass door that led to the balcony. She rested her hand on the rail and stared up at the moon, she felt the tears but blinked them back before replacing it with a small smile, recollecting her childhood memories, the best part of her life so far.. She had always enjoyed staying under the moon or watching it from her bedroom window, her mom had called it moon bathing and had often times, picked her from the porch where she had fallen asleep while moon bathing. She remembered how her family had been perfect then, how Amelia wouldn’t stop telling her of how envious she was of them as a family.. Amy hadn’t had the chance to experience what a happy family look like, at least not after her father’s death when she was eight, that was especially what drew her to Amy.. Leona had been a happy child then, though piss poor, they were comfortable as a family and Leona would’ve gladly chosen that life a thousand times over this one..
Leona rubbed her palm on her hand, the cold hitting her, she needs to get over this. Her father must still be rejoicing over his soon-to-be-gone debts.. She needs to tell him it wasn’t happening anymore.. Looks like he’ll have to face his own problems this time and deal with them.. Alone. Without her being involved. But she doubt that he’ll win this..
That’s his issue to deal with anyway.. She had done her part.
Leona’s ringing phone stopped her work, she grabbed her phone on her desk, gave it a glance and swiped to the receiver..
“Hey Amy” she said, using her free hand to scroll down her laptop..
“Amy, are you okay? You don’t sound too well”
“Guess who came looking for me at work?” She asked, her voice a little hitched, she heard her sniff.
“Jack?.. Oh my God! Did he make you cry?” She asked, focusing on the phone..
“He wishes.. You know I can’t cry over a guy Lee. It’s the bitch” she said and Leona breathed out.. She knew who Amy was talking about..
“I guess it didn’t go well”
“It never goes well Lee.. That’s parent for you. It’s even worse that she thinks she can just leave and reappear anytime she likes and talk to me like we have nothing on each other” Amy said, sniffing. Leona sighed.
“Are you okay, Amy?”
“I’m good. She left some money before leaving again, as usual and I’m about spending most of it on new outfits, my closet’s a mess. Are you busy?”
“Um.. There’s just a few thing left to finalize, won’t take more than five minutes. Will you come pick me up? Mom dropped me at work today, didn’t get to bring my car”
“Yeah, sure.. Will be there soon” she said and after exchanging byes the call got disconnected.
Leona sighed, remembering how her mom had tried to cajole her into telling her what was wrong after seeing her red face, Leona had tried to cover up but her mom knew she wasn’t telling the truth, left with no choice she poured out her encounter with Greg and for the first time in her life, Leona saw her mom turn red with anger.. That minute she was ready to pay the Rodriguez a hearty visit but Leona had stooped her.. She didn’t know her mother as a person that gets angry, she didn’t even stay angry for long when she got to know about her husband games with other women, she never even got this angry when he had solely squandered a 100million naira loan or when he wasn’t able to fulfill his duties in providing for the family.. Leona had never seen her mother this way before and for her to be like this, she knew that what she had revealed, had gripped tightly at her heart..
Leona had to eat, at least a little to assure her mom that she was fine and stop her from brooding over it, her mom had personally tucked her in, she was sure her mom would talk to her dad about it and she feared that it might not be as calmly as it always had. Her mom served her breakfast on bed, watched her eat and helped her choose an outfit while she had her shower and voluntarily, she drove her to work, promising to come pick her up.. Leona was starting to feel like a first grader again.
Leona finished up with the accounts she was handling, she turned off her monitor and glanced at the time.. Five minutes had elapsed, she took her cup of coffee and lifted it up to her lip.. She heard a car pulled into the driver’s seconds later and Amelia stepped down from it, she grabbed her bag, tucked her phone into it and stood up.. She walked out of her office and met Amy coming toward the door.. She smiled at her..
“Saw you drive in from the window” Leona said, giving her a brief hug.
“Come on” she called and they hopped into her car.
During the drive she put a call to her mom..
“Lee dear.. Are you done at the office already? Wait for me, I’ll just take these sausages down and come pick you up”
“Um mom. There’ll be no need for that okay, Amelia picked me up. We’re going to the mall” she said.
“Oh.. Will you be fine honey?”
“Yes mom and besides this is good for me, don’t you agree?”
“I do. Take care of yourself okay?”
“Do you want me to send you some money, you know just in case you need to get one or two things?”
“No mom. Mine’s enough. Thanks” she said “I’m hanging up now mom and I’ll be back before it gets too dark. Bye mom”
“Okay honey. Bye” she said and Leona hung up.
“Your mom wanted to pick you up?” Amelia asked.
“Yes.. She drove me to work too. I think that’s too much for a twenty two year old lady”
“I wish my mom cared half of yours” Amelia said and Leona regretted bringing it up.
“I’m sorry Amy, I–
“Hey, I’m not here to think about her or let you console me because of her, okay. So can you stop that?” She asked, giving Leona a serious look and she nodded slowly, moistening her lower lip with her tongue.
“So, how’d your free day go. Had tons of fun?”
“I wish. Did mom’s grocery, visited bobby’s and met Greg” she said..
“Greg. The guy you had a date with?”
“Business date, Amelia” she corrected, looking away.
“Yeah whatever” she said dryly. “So he finally agreed to do business with your company?”
“Nah. He actually gave me a crazy condition”
“Crazy? What was it?”
“Sex.. Isn’t that what all crazy guys ask for?”
“O-oh. Looks like he’s into you. Don’t tell me you ditched him”
“It’s more like I pushed him off, he practically almost forced me into his bed” Leona said, disgust surrounding her voice.
“Geez. He’s a pervert. Guess you kicked his balls hard to a coma state, huh?”
“Now I wish I had. Couldn’t do more than push him off me”
“Such guts.. That guy must be crazy. He’s probably one of those over extravagant, pompous brat that think they can get any woman to their bed. Those kind are my worst” she said and Leona nodded, glad her friend was flowing well with her, her problems forgotten even though it was at the expense of refreshing memories she was successfully pushing back.
They took a turn..
“So I guess he isn’t going through with the contract?”
“That’s not my problem” Leona answered curtly and Amy gave her a sorry glance.
They passed a city hall and noticed it was filled with crowd of people, going in and coming out with papers and smiles people hung around outside, talking and smiling. Amelia slowed down.
“I wonder what’s going on in there” Amelia said.
“It doesn’t look like a concert or a show” Leona added.
“I noticed that. Let’s go check what’s happening” Amelia said and Leona wanted to refuse but she let Amelia have her way. She reversed and parked the car by the roadside, took her seatbelt off and got down, Leona got down too and followed her as she walked to a group of people.
“Um excuse me,” she said and they all turned to her “why are there so much people? Is there a fan signing event or something?”
“It’s not actually an event. It’s just this charity company that’s giving out college scholarship to 5000 lucky teenagers and a job opportunity after it. We’re all here for the registration” she explained.
“Oh.. Thank you” Amelia said and was about leaving when Leona stopped her, she walked back to the girl, she had talked to.
“Hi,” she flashed her a toothy smile, getting her attention “Do you think I’ll be allowed to register for someone who isn’t here?”
“Um.. I don’t know miss. You can probably just fill their name and get the form, that’s if they let you” she said and Leona nodded before thanking her.
“You want to get a scholarship for someone, who?” Amelia asked.
“Um.. The cupcake guy?”
“Cupcake guy? Who’s that?”
“The guy at Bobby’s, the one that sells cupcake on the outside bench” she said and Amelia eyes grew wide.
“Don’t tell me you’re talking about that unhealthy dude that gave you that cheap cake?”
“He might be unhealthy to you Amy but his cupcakes are more than cheap and besides, I think he’ll need this, I still owe him one for finding my card and I don’t know if it’s the last day today” she said. Amelia scoffed then gave her a serious look.
“You’re joking right?”
“No. Come-on, let’s go in before all the forms get picked” Leona walked toward the door, seeing Amelia give her a confused and bewildered expression, she pulled back and dragged her along.
Leona entered the hall, rolling her gaze over the crowd of people.. She sighed a small lane..
“No thank you Lee, I’ll just stay here” Amelia pulled back frowning her face at everyone in the hall. Leona walked to the lane and in no time, she got attended to..
“Your name please” the woman inquired.
“Um, actually ma’am.. I’m not here for myself, I’m doing this for someone else” she said. “Is it possible?”
“Yes. Except that you won’t go on with the proper registration, you’ll just get the form and have the person bring it here tomorrow for the registration proper” she said and Leona sighed in relief and nodded. “So what’s the name of this person?” She asked, ready to input it into her system.
Leona opened her mouth to talk but no word came out, it was then she realized it.. She didn’t know the name of the guy she had talked to more than twice, enjoyed each of his company, tried to kiss comfortably and now trying to help. Leona bit on her lower lip.
Had to stay up late to charge and fulfill my promise since my phone went down earlier..
T. B. C
BY BLESSING SILVER.