?ATTITUDE
MEETS
ARROGANCE?
©Fideh
Episode 40
Ciara’s POV
“Not now Jordan….” I gro-an ed and walked past him….
“How is your injury now??? I saw you hvgging him…”
I halted the moment I heard those words…
“He was just been there for me as a friend.”
“The project we doing with the minister will be over in eight months after that I will give you a divorce. I can no longer f0rç£ things…”
For the first time, he didn’t shake or yell at me
. He spoke very calmly..
Be happy Ciara, in eight months you will be free. Jump up and down in excitement girlfriend…
Why was I sad??? I felt sadness weighing me down. It was what I always wanted but then it felt like it wasn’t what I nee-ded…
Come think of it, I am the one who should give him the divorce not the other way round. He ruined my life, I actually did him a favour…
“I guess since we been honest, I will be too…I am mad at you because if you didn’t f0rç£ me to this maybe my dad would have forgiven me, Jaxon would be mine. But i am the unlucky girl who doesn’t get what she wants in life…” I stuttered and he said nothing…
He just stood from the be-d and walked to where I was…
“It’s a high time you un-derstand this Ciara, your dad was mad with you even before we met. If Jaxon loved you as much as you claim he did he would have fought so ha-rd for you
. I know I made a mistake forcing you to marry me and I have realised today I can’t do this anymore. I give up Ciara…”
I swallowed down ha-rd the now developed lump of tears in my throat..
He was right, I was angry with myself and wanted to vent it on him because I always thought he was the reason to all my problems..
My anger towards him was to protect the pain I was feeling. He was the easy prey on my list..
I turned around to face him, “I have always been mad because I felt this marriage was suffocating. I wasn’t happy, I never wanted to get married in my pyjamas, to you and everytime I see Jaxon happy and laughing with Ariana I feel you snatched that from me…Thinking maybe my dad would have been less angry if I didn’t get married to you makes me more mad. Today I felt hurt my dad not wanting to talk to me, having to be humiliated because of what people think it was an affair and yet it was two lovers out for a getaway. Do you think it was fair???” I stuttered and he looked hurt..
His eyes were glimmering with watery eyes…
“All I know is that I fell in love with you and all this while I have been denying it. Maybe I wasn’t meant to be loved. Beatrice now you…I won’t f0rç£ it anymore, I won’t ban you from talking to Jaxon because I am the one in the wrong place…” I regretted being mad at him as soon as those words leapt from hisl-ips..
“Here,” He took my hand and placed it on his fast beating heart, “I have never felt what I feel for you but today I promise you that I will never act like your husband again. What I ask for you is just continue acting like we are in love for these eight months and then after that I will set you free and give you five million dollars to start a new life…Love is not a business deal, you made me realise that life is more than sadness and bitterness…” He seemed to be one b!ow away from breaking…
“Jor…..” He placed his f!nger on myl-ips cutting me off, “You don’t have to explain anything. I know you don’t love me and this relationsh!pis suffocating. How do you think I felt, you sharing your pain with him and not me. I was hurt, very hurt. You left me alone by the roadside not caring how I got home..It was my mistake and i am paying for it. I f0rç£d you into this, so don’t be sorry. Just eight months and it will be over. ”
I didn’t realise I was crying until he wiped them away with his thumbs, “I am not worth your tears…”
Did he say he loved me but why me???? I didn’t deserve all i have always done is piss him off. Maybe it was the best thing to do…I didn’t love him but I had a soft sp©t for him. We nee-ded this break, he nee-ded to forget him. Jaxon was the only one in my heart and that wasn’t going to change soon .
But why was I sad??? He is finally letting me go.
Do I want to go??? I can finally fight for the love I feel for Jaxon but is it worth it???
“If this is what you want Jordan then it is fine by me…”
I didn’t deserve love too. Maybe I wasn’t meant to be happy either.
But it hurts so much that it’s finally over. Sadness overpowered every other feeling. It didn’t feel if that was what I wanted anymore.
Who was i going to tease, argue with??? Is it for the best???
“Okay…” He k!$$£d me on the forehead and left the room. The moment he slammed the door on his way out, I felt lonely and abandoned.
It was like a p@rt of me was missing. Did I make the right choice by agreeing to this madness???Was I wrong to be mad????
I sat by the be-d and pu-ll-ed my legs to my che-st and held them so ti-ght…
I sobbe-d and tears flooded like the waters rushing down from a waterfall and the only time I st©pped was to fill the lungs with fresh air…
It’s over Ciara, you are finally free but not happy…
Jordan’s POV
In the office I tried to focus but I couldn’t. It was finally over..
Only love can wound so de-ep, cut to the very core..
I really felt raw like there was no skin over my pain and the wind made it bleed..
How was I going to do it??? It was easier said than done. I have learnt to love her so much and without her the world is just a dark globe rotating…
It is said if you love someone, you will do what always make them happy… I was suffocating her and what would make her happy is her so far from me…
Only eight months Jordan, she will be beside you…After that, you will go back to been the lonely broken man…
Why do everyone I love leave??? Am I so horrible??? I took out my phone and scrolled down her ph0tos on IG, it made me feel better seeing her even thou she was out of my reach…
I can do this, it’s not so ha-rd to act like you are not in love. I will just avoid her and that’s it.
I made a mistake confessing how I felt but atleast I am relieved I don’t have to lie to myself anymore….
For me to be okay when she leaves after eight months, I have to learn to hate her so that she can pu-ll away from me…
Jaxon’s POV
I know it was wrong for me to call her but I can’t help it.
I am empty, lonely if only I was strong enough to fight for her then things would have been different…
She was right, if I loved her as much as I claimed I did I would have fought for her.. Regrets washed over me like the long slow waves on a shallow beach…
Seeing her in pain and misery made me realise I drove her there. Why did I not st©p my brother???
I am not close to the one I love.
. She got away and I have no one to blame for that ap@rt from myself…
I walked towards Ariana’s room and knocked with the hope she was still awake. I nee-ded company, comfort, a hvg, soothing words say them all…
“Jaxon???” She yawned, “What are you doing here???”
“Can I come in plea-se???”
“Yes sure….”
The moment she locked the door, I turned to her and hvgged her so ti-ght.
“I am crumbling down….” I stuttered…
“What did Ciara do now????” She asked with utmost confident.
“How did you know it was her???” I pu-ll-ed back, squee-zing the tears from my eyes…
“Because she is the only one who gets to you.So what’s up????”
“Today she c@m£ home injured and it was because of me. They were arguing about me and got into an accident…Why am I always causing her pain??? I didn’t fight for her when she means the world to me. This marriage is misery to her and it’s my fault…” I cried out in violence more than gale…
“Ssssh!!!!” She cu-mpped my face, “Sh*t happened and all you can do is make things better for her. St©p coming between her and Jordan. She is a married woman and the best thing you can do is move away. As long as you are there, she will never move on too…”
“But I wish you saw the pain in her eyes, how sad she looked??? The vibr@nt Ciara was no more and that hurts me. I want my Ciara to be Ciara again Ariana. Even if I can’t have her, I want her to be fine…” Tears dr!pp£dfrom my eyes….
“Then walk away Jaxon, let her also move on with Jordan. Or wait for her until she gets divorced….”
“Thank you Ariana…It felt really great talking to you…Let me go to my room now…” I beamed and she nodded.
I was glad I had someone in the house who un-derstood what I was going throu-gh…
I moved closer to k!ssher on the cheek when ourl-ips ru-bbe-d and for a second we looked de-ep into each other’s eyes…
“I am sorry….” I said almost in a whisper…
“Its okay Jaxon, as long as you didn’t k!ssme. We are good…” She poked my arm..
“Okay…” I chuckled and left…
There was something different with her, I can’t really explain what it is…
Ciara’s POV
Finally I landed on another contract. Since I was done working for Jaxon, I was jobless and depended on Jordan for upkeep. It’s not like he minded.
Jordan had been acting weird for the past one month. He rarely spoke to me or even eat at home.
He always c@m£ home late and left very early. It felt lonely but this was the price I had to pay.
There are times he would sleep in the office, on the sofa but rarely beside me…It was like he was avoiding me…
I wanted to tell him the good news so I woke up at 4am and waited for him to come take a shower since he sle-pt in the office…
When he walked in, I pretended to be asleep so that he wouldn’t leave…
“Jordan, I finally got another job…” I said calmly when he was getting into the bathroom.
“That’s good, atleast you won’t have to stay home like a housewife anymore…” He replied dryly not looking at me…
“Are you not going to ask me where or with who????” I retorted and he just remained quiet…
“I will tell you even if you don’t wanna hear. Isikote, a Zambia tycoon son who recently moved to the country…And he nee-ds a designer and a stylist so I will start today….” I said excitedly and he just slammed the door into the bathroom.
Why did I bother telling him anyway??? He said he won’t act like my husband. Ciara, why did you have to open your big mouth now you feel humiliated….
I got back to be-d and woke up around 9 am to get re-ady..Since it was my first day, I had to look sas-sy.
I wore a black pencil Sk-irt, a white blouse and a pair of nûd£ stilettos
. A little t©uçh of makeup and I was good to go…
Brian s£nt me the location pin on my way there and in a few minutes I was there. He was such a darling to always have my back…
I rang the bell expecting a handsome man in an Italian suit, well built but no he was a thin, tall guy in his bathrobe with a glas-s of whisky on his hand. He was handsome though but not like Jordan.
Did I just say Jordan??? Truth be told, he is handsome….
“You must be Ciara, right???” I nodded and outstretched my hand for a handshake only for him to hvg me, “Handshakes are for friends and we are more than friends…”
That felt weird, we just met.
“plea-se come in, I am sorry my place is messy…”
There was beer cans lying at the table, two empty bottles of whisky, some cigarettes and a bottle of water.
“I could come another time or even tomorrow???” I suggested but he took my hand and walked me to the sofa, “Relax…” He whispered se-ductively…
“Can we start then????” I asked and he just smiled mischievously. Now I was feeling uncomfortable…
“Why are you in a hurry???? Has someone ever told you, you have beautiful long legs???” He placed his hand on my th!gh and I pushed it away…
“You have a ring, are you married??? Does your husband treat you right???”
“Yes I am married and he treats me right. I think I should get going…” I stood to go only to be pu-ll-ed back to the sofa.
“Sit!!!!” He said almost in a loud voice that I flin-ched then he smiled like nothing happened, “I have heard you are among the best young designers in Kenya. I love to work with young and beautiful…” He c*ressed my face ma-king me pu-ll back…
“Isikote, I will get going now…” I stammered but he ignored me and moved closer and closer ensuring there was no distance between us…
“What are you doing????”
“I am just tou-ching you, it won’t hurt. Trust me I am gentle. Or do you love it rou-gh???” He moved his face closer to mine and I am sure I almost peed on myself.
Dear God, if you get me out of this mess I promise to try and be nice..Don’t let him m©l£stme plea-se…
It seems luck wasn’t on my side, he tried to k!ssme but I pushed him back and sl@pped him so ha-rd …
“Don’t you ever do that to me again!!!” I warned and walked to the door only to find it locked…
I heard him laugh evilly behind me and knew that was the end of me…
It was time to pay for my sins…
“I always get what I want. I want you, I get you. You can’t take me anywhere… So are you going to cooperate or we do it my way???” He held my hair and I froze…
I wish I wore a wig today…
“It was a bad mistake to even think of sl@pping me…” He threatened and I couldn’t help but to start crying,”I am sorry Isikote, don’t hurt me. I am a married woman, all I wanted is a job…”
I tried talking s-en-se into him but he didn’t care..
“I just want you…” He turned me around to face him and reached out for my phone in my purse…The moment my phone landed and scattered on the floor I knew it was the beginning of the end…
He threw me across the room and when I tried moving I couldn’t.
. I thought I would crawl but he lifted me with my hair causing pain to flow throu-gh me..
“Just tell me what you want. My husband is very rich, he could get everything for you…”
“I am a tycoon’s son and the only thing I do is p@rty and have se-x. Too bad gorgeous, you walked in when I was hor-ny…” There was this disgusting sm-irk on his face…
I was shaking and sobbing but that didn’t move him.
There was a vase beside me, I tried picking it but it ended up breaking beside me…
“The designer is trying to be smart with me!!!” He snarled between his closed teeth before pushing me to the floor where I fell on the broken pieces and gro-an ed in pain.
He then dragged slightly from the broken glas-ses and sat on t©p of me…He to-re my blouse and my b©dy shut down..
“You like it rou-gh…”
His white knuckles gr!pp£dmy n£¢k and he begun k!ss!ngme…I tried pushing him away only to receive sl@ps and punches.
That’s was it. It’s over..
I surrendered my fate to the heavens and shut my eyes ti-ght when I heard the thud of something…
I slightly opened my eyes only to see Jordan standing there…
“How dare you mess with my woman????” He thun-dered…
Jordan’s POV
I was happy my girl was getting back to work, I know she was distressed with just staying at home but now she can do what she loves most..
I am glad she upd@t£d me about her work today even though I acted I didn’t care, I was still happy…
I was from a board meeting when I found Sebastian comfortably seating on my seat.
“Young man, nob©dy sits on that seat ap@rt from me!!!” I tea-sed but instead of even smiling he looked bothered..
“What’s wrong Seb????” I asked in a worried tone…
“I nee-d your help Jordan…”
“Talk to me???”
“I nee-d you to help me talk to the commissioner. There is this new Zambia man who r*ped one of my…..”
Wait is my wife not going to work for a Zambian man. What if is the same man???
“Is the name of the man Isikote????” I confirmed and he nodded,”How do you know???”
“Seb, my wife is in trouble…She was going to work for him today. Let me call home and find out if she alre-ady left…”
I felt every muscle tense and my hands begun to open and close with each li-ck breath…
plea-se God, protect my wife…
When Caro told me she left like an hour ago, I lost it.
“Seb, do you know his address????” I held him by the collar…
“Yes, let me forward it to you…”
“Seb go and come with the police. I nee-d to go get my wife before that bastard does anything to her…”
I ran like a fool from my office to the parking lot that my employees were wondering what was the problem…
I drove like a mad person and when I arrived there I didn’t have time to think.
I just broke the door and got in like nothing happened only to see him on t©p of her while she was so bloody…
“How dare you mess with my woman???” I thun-dered and he froze…
Her face was drowning in tears, eyes blood sh0t.. In minutes I r!pp£dhim off her and threw him across…Anger was flowing in my veins. Nob©dy messes with my woman, I was going to kill someb©dy….
She just lied there looking helpless….
I brou-ght a fist to his face snapping his nose into a grotesquerie…Another swift punch on his mouth and crushed down his ton-gue soa-ked in the taste of blood…He was receiving endless punches when I heard Sebastian’s voice behind me,”Jordan, that’s enough. The police are here…”
He struggled to raise his face spitting blood only to get a simple sidekick on his stomach landing him on the floor again…
I wanted to beat him more but the Sebastian held me back…
I ran to her and there was dried blood all over her b©dy…Her blouse was torn ex-posing her che-st…
She didn’t talk or even move..Tears just rolled down her cheeks uncontrollable..
I took her in my arms and carried her to the car.
“Seb call anyone at home and tell them to have the doctor re-ady at home…”
I gently placed her on the pas-s£nger’s seat and covered her with my coat..
Seeing her in that state broke me, if only I investigated about that a*shole this wouldn’t have happened…
I took out my handkerchief and wiped away her tears but they weren’t re-ady to st©p flowing like a river…
When we got home, I took her the bridal style from the car into the house where I found everyone waiting for us in the hallway…
“What happened???” They all asked behind me…
“Where the hell is the doctor???” I thun-dered…
“He is in the living room…”Jaxon answered.
“Tell him to come to our room now before I lose my wife!!!” I ordered….
When we got to our room, I lied her gently on the be-d waiting for the doctor…
If something happens to her, I will never forgive myself…
********
Tbc