??A Howl In The Night??
?She’s mine?
?From Novel r0m@n�
?Chapter 38?
SEMI FINALE
?The Decision to Live?
I stare at the man before me, my f!ngersti-ght£ñing over the crown until the ti-ps of my f!nger turn white. My knees buckle as a sudden weight as strong as an avalanche pounds against my shoulders. I can’t tell the reality of it, but in this one moment, it doesn’t seem to matter. In my delirium, I try to form his name with myl-ips.
The man yells something and starts running towards me. I feel my b©dy sl!pas rocky bottoms shift into an eternal void. The weight drags me into the abyss, burying my vision into the darkness. There is no time to think or even breathe, yet my descent seems to occur in slow motion, my arms flailing without command or control. And all the while I am watching throu-gh the lens of a c@m£ra, powerless as a glas-s wall separates me from my b©dy and reality.
Until arms encircle my shoulders, bringing me upwards into an unfathomable warmth. The familiar scent disarms me, and my eyes blink as I start to realize what is happening. He c@m£ back. He found me.
I had almost forgotten his face and t©uçh in the face of such alarming discoveries. My heart aches as I am now overwhelmed with this comfort and… reason brou-ght upon by his pres£nce.
Robbe-d of my willpower, I surrender myself to his embr@ce while turning my b©dy into his che-st. For a few moments I listen to his beating heart, the de-ep breaths as his shoulders shake. I almost allow myself to smile as his breathing steadies. This is why.
“Hey,” he whispers in my ear, ti-ght£ñing his arms around me. “You can’t leave me that easily.”
I smile weakly, strangely not hating myself for agreeing with him. The warmth from his b©dy seems to permeate into my heart, and my f!ngersslowly relax over the gilded crown.
After a few seconds I let him slowly re-lease me, looking around the room. It still has retained its spherical shape and steep cliffs, but the scenes that flashed across the rounded walls has vanished. The room appears empty in every s-en-se of the word, and for a few seconds I wonder if any of the past events actually happened. None of it truly seems real.
Griffin and Danae inch towards me, while Jake and Wes stay back to glare at Ray. “What were you two doing here? Where have you been?” Wes loudly asks. He tries to look strong, but we can all see his knees shaking.
I glance at Ray, alarmed to see that his eyes had returned to its normal color. He is shaking his head nervously, muttering to himself.
As the others gather around me, I crumble un-der the weight of their stares and hvg the crown to my che-st. I… can’t tell them. Even if I know they can help, even if it will make me feel a thousand times better, myl-ips just won’t form the words. Or any words, for that matter.
“Why didn’t you help Mona yourself?” Xavier furiously snaps at Ray. He turns away from me and starts marching towards Ray with a dark glare. Ray just stands there, totally frozen, a lone figure against the backdrop of the dark, desolate walls.
“It’s okay,” I caution him, reaching for his wrist. “It’s not his fault.”
“How is it not his fault?” Xavier asks, still turned away from me. His wrist twists out of my grasp, f!ngerssli-pping around my own.
“He’s been throu-gh a lot,” I say softly, questioning myself as I defend him. Should I just let the others get mad at him? Something prevents me from telling the truth.
The truth will hurt.
We make eye contact again, and he simply stares at me, green eyes devoid of any emotion or truth. The fire within me begs for the unveiling of the facade, the fabric holding us together in the patterns of fate. But then the fire fades as Xavier’s warmth snakes throu-gh my arm and the comfort reaches me again.
“I suppose you have,” Wes speaks up, a smile finally crossing his features. “I’m glad that you are safe and with us again. You nee-d to tell us all you’ve learned about what we are dealing with.”
“What we are dealing with?” Ray repeats, his eyes darting around the room and his mouth twitching. He starts moving towards the door as Danae and Jake follow him. Their eyes seem more guarded, as if they are expecting something.
“You know, with the crazy Shifters and all that,” Wes replies casually, walking languidly to the door. “And we would also like to know what this room is, and why you two are here.”
“It’s the Shifter’s dungeon,” Ray replied quic-kly, “it’s where they have been keeping me.” He throws another glance my way as if daring me to deny it.
Xavier leads me to the others, his hand ti-ght£ñing around mine. “Let’s talk about it where we can have some light. We wouldn’t want the Shifters to come back anyways.”
I try to make contact with Ray again before we leave the room, but Xavier is dragging me with such f0rç£ that I don’t even catch a glance. There are so many questions I have, but the biggest one that looms over me is… what now? The web of lies is being spun and one gust of wind could completely destroy it.
We proceed throu-gh the elegant hallway and then throu-gh the double doors into the large room we first entered. It looks different now, with a little bit of light wafting throu-gh the windows and the small candles burning brightly. I can see the detailing of the design and furniture, all with an old-fashioned feel to it. Being able to see more of the castle, however, doesn’t make me feel safe or even welcome.
And even as we exit the castle, I get the small, eerie feeling that we are being watched.
Ray is walking ahead, leading us around the perimeter of the castle. His steps seem shaky and unsure, and for moments I catch the edges of his skin blurring. Then I blink my eyes and it seems to be just a trick of the light. The others are walking ahead of us, seemingly unaffected by the strangeness in the air. But I know Xavier can s-en-se it, for his other hand has balled into a ti-ght fist.
“You feel that?” He leans down and whispers into my ear. Within that whisper I can feel the smoothness of honey dripping down his words into my willing ears. Even though I know its not intentional, I feel a buzz from him that is far different from what he’s talking about. Instead of responding to him, I catch myself staring at hisl-ips.
“Uh, uh, uh… yeah. I do.” I turn my head away, a blus-h forming on my cheeks. Thankfully Xavier doesn’t pursue it, and as I recover his hand never leaves mine.
I don’t want to leave this.
Ray takes us to a small cave in a mountain beside the castle. I look around us, the trees blocking my view of the towering turrets. Once again, the area seems free of life and movement, and I hear nothing but the roar of the wind. But I can’t shake that feeling, and I wonder if it comes from something greater than what we can un-derstand.
The cave is small and inti-mate, the few of us standing shoulder-to-shoulder in order to fit inside. I lean back against the wall, confused as to what Ray means by bringing us in here.
“Okay, so what do you want to know?” Ray asks, sitting crosslegged on the dirt floor. The others slowly slide to their knees. Xavier’s expression turns to stone, and he lets my hand sl!pfrom his.
“Tell us about your imprisonment,” he says, leaning back against the wall with his eyes focused on Ray.
Ray starts to talk, weaving a tale about how the Shifters dragged him to a dungeon and kept him there, feeding him sparingly. I tune out to his story, only paying attention to the werewolves. They look so strong, and determined, yet beaten and bruised as this world takes its toll. Not a smile is to be found as the pack listens to Ray, and I realize that true joy hasn’t existed for a long while. There’s relief—that Ray is okay and back in the group—but also distrust and suspicion. When did we fall ap@rt at the seams, unravelling to the darkness of our fate?
Frightened by my own thoughts, my hand subconsciously wra-ps around Xavier’s arm in an attempt to forget. To have the bandage wra-pped around our troubles and singularity of predestined purpose so that I don’t have to look at it anymore.
Probably perplexed by my movement, Xavier casts a quic-k glance at me. His hair is growing longer, cascading over his eyes and down the back of his n£¢k. I feel the urge to brush it out of the way, but restrain myself as he turns again to focus on Ray again.
“Well, I’m glad we got you out of there,” Xavier says firmly as Ray finishes his story. “Now we have to come up with a new game plan.”
“What now…” I murmur quietly, looking at the ground hopelessly. There is no game plan. Or even a survival plan.
But they don’t seem to know that, ignoring my whispered words to discuss their next strategy. But is it even a strategy? All of our efforts just seem to be poking at the air with a stick.
“We should head away from the Castle to see if there is a border,” Danae suggests, peering out from the cave into the fine mist. “It’s better than staying here where the Shifters can find us.”
“But don’t you think the Shifters are hiding something?” Jake asks fiercely. “We shouldn’t run away like cowards.”
“It’s a big world out there,” I finally speak, looking at each member of the group in the eye. “We don’t want to waste our energy when we are so low on food.”
Everyone looks at each other, morbid whispers hanging in the suffocating air. Xavier looks at me again, this time searching my face for answers.
“I think we nee-d to rest,” Ray offers, standing up quic-kly. “Let’s find some warm shelter. Two or three can fit in this cave.”
I try to agree with him, but the burden of knowledge weighs down on me as countless questions come to mind. What is he doing?
Why are you running?
Xavier stands up as well, pu-lling me with him. “We will find some shelter as well. Wes, stay here. Danae, you should help him.” Danae nods, and I notice a hint of purple in Wes’s face. What’s wrong with him?
“We think he’s getting sick or his injury is infected,” Xavier whispers to me as we start walking. “He has been feeling fatigued for quite some time and injuries aren’t healing as quic-kly in this world.”
“That’s not good…” I say softly, my eyes narrowing as Ray takes a turn ahead of us into the un-derbrush. Xavier leads me over in that direction, only to see Ray backing into a niche in the ground with a tree trunk over his head.
“A few can join me over here!” he calls back to us, and I visibly sigh in relief. He wasn’t going to disappear again.
“What?” Xavier asks quietly.
“Uh… nothing.” I smile weakly, starting to walk over towards Ray. Xavier pu-lls me back, giving me that annoying suspicious look again.
“We are going to find shelter over this way!” He calls back, starting to walk in the opposite direction. “Jake and the others will join you.”
“Xavier?” I ask, my eyes wi-dening. He only ti-ght£ñs his hold on me and keeps looking straight ahead. I start to feel guilt, but at the same time I still know that I can’t tell him. I can’t rob that spark of life from him.
We keep walking for quite some time, until I finally decide to figure out what’s going on. “Do we really have to walk so far away from the others?” I ask him, the exasperation impossible to hide from my voice. “I think we pas-sed close to three other sp©ts where we could have had some shelter for a while.”
He smiles thinly, continuing to walk forwards. “I want to make sure.” He leads me throu-gh a pathway between trees, revea-ling miles of the same empty, desolate scenery.
“Sure of wha-“ He whirls me around to face him, his hand pu-lling my b©dy towards his in a crashing k!ss. My knees almost buckle to the pressure and I nearly forget to breathe in the sudden, overwhelming intensity. “Xavier!” I call out chokingly as he retreats only to change angles and leave me breathless yet again.
His other hand leaves my n£¢k and trails down my back, pu-lling me closer until there is no space between us. I lose myself in the repeated k!sses, questioning everything that I know to be true for this one feeling that overcomes all obligation and supposed meaning. My legs become like a rag doll’s and I am completely dependent on Xavier’s support. In response he lifts my legs so that I am cradled in his arms.
“Sure that we couldn’t be heard,” he slyly whispers in my ear, brushing hisl-ips down the side of my face into the curvature of my n£¢k. I let out a small whimper as he k!sses my collarbone, his hand brushing my leg. “I’m so glad you’re safe, Mona. I don’t know what I would have done if I lost you.” His face moves upwards, dropping a light k!sson my forehead. I stare into his eyes, my heart melting as I see myself reflected within them.
And as he moves towards the base of a tree, carefully lowering me onto the ground as if I was… a precious object, memories start to flash within my head of him, and of us. We met before, in the real world. I hated him because I felt f0rç£d into something fake, but he made the connection between us real and authentic with every pas-sing day. He was annoying and persistent, but turns out that happened to be my type because I fell for him anyways.
I remember all of the moments, puzzle pieces fitting together instantaneously. There was the time in the mansion, the time where I betrayed his trust, the time where he told me he loved me anyways, and still continued to love me even as I pushed him away. I remember the Sharuken ritual, when the council told me he was gone although in reality he never left. He was the one who never tried to change me but always accepted who I was.
His thumb gently pushes my mouth open, and hisl-ips meet mine once more. My arms wra-p around his n£¢k desperately even as he temporarily re-leases me. “Forgive me for being selfish,” he says quietly, “But I nee-d you now more than I nee-d anything else.”
I pu-ll him back to me, his face millimeters from my own. “I love you, Xavier. I remember everything. Now I know that I have nee-ded you from the beginning.” I smile at him, then close the distance as his eyes wi-den. His hands grip at my shoulders, as if begging for confirmation.
His knees fold from the surprise and he falls to his side against me. I guide his arm around my w@!st and roll into his embr@ce, fully intending to let go of any obligations and practicality for the most important person in my life. He lets me control our movements, and I add pressure into the k!ss, ru-bbing his shoulder and the sides of his arm.
Xavier smiles at me, leaning back as the surprise wears off. “I’m so glad you remember. I promise that I will always be there for you. You will never regret this.” He r0ûghly k!sses my temple. “I love… you too and always will.”
He pu-lls my b©dy into his and we lie against each other, looking into the endless sky and dreaming of an eternity together. Even though the ground is cold and ha-rd , my heart is enveloped in an ethereal warmth. This is my home. This is where I belong.
* * *
Whispers of judgement.
The winds howl into the night, but I am unafraid. I am stronger than anything this world has to offer. She gives me strength… and hope.
I lean against a tree, robbe-d of all my energy. Breaths are a triviality to my kind, but I nee-d them… to keep my identity. To exist rather than to fade away into the endless mist.
There is no blood here. There is no tears or anger, no happiness or laughter. We are only shells, but we still have the hope of life. She must come soon, or I will crumble to the emptiness of this world.
I know she will s£nd me on the path to deliverance.
My eyes flutter, and I awake to the roar of the wind. I wonder why I am not shivering, and then quic-kly recognize the warmth of the man right beside me. It feels so nice here. I could stay here… forever…
I want to say that I’m sorry, but I can’t form the words.
I want to say that you don’t have to do this, but I can’t form the words.
Because I’m losing myself and everything I value. I can’t feel or breathe, completely stagnant in a static world. Feelings are a dull ache, and actions are beyond my means. I can’t form much of anything that mirrors what I would call myself. Does self even exist anymore? I would like to say yes, but I still can’t form the words.
Save me, plea-se. Although I can’t beg.
I j£rk upwards, my che-st heaving. Even though the air bites with a hint of frost, my arms and head glisten with sweat. The whispers are caving in on me.
Xavier lies beside me, still slee-ping. His shi-t rests against the tree, and I carefully pick it up and dr@p£ it over him. He must have been really tired, because he’s not usually such a heavy sleeper.
I stand up quic-kly, trying to rid my head of all the madness swirling around inside it. I… know what I saw, but I’m not sure that I want to admit it to myself. So I’ll just call it lunacy. Insanity. Nothing that has anything to do with me.
I bend back down, staring at Xavier’s peaceful resting face. My hand reaches out and brushes the hair away from his eyes, and for a minute I believe that I can forget everything once again.
Don’t forget who you are, Mona.
I shook, standing back up quic-kly and pacing around the small clearing. Why am I having these dreams? I saw Shifters, nearly dead, pleading… to me for help. Are these real, or my own illusions? What should I do about them?
I turn my head to see a glint of metal hidden at the base of a thick shru-b. Walking over, I dig around in the leaves to find a crown with a pulsating, ru-by red crystal at the t©p of it. I pick it up, feeling the weight and texture only to find that this is… the same crown.
Where did I even leave it to begin with? I know I was holding it in the core of the castle, but I don’t remember anything after that. One thing is for sure, I certainly didn’t put it here.
I hold it awkwardly while looking around the area, half expecting to see Ray hiding in the background. Who is orche-strating this? Everything just seems to fit together, just like my earlier dreams of Ray and the castle, and in real life things don’t work out that way.
For you, it does.
The crown brings with it the burden of responsibility like a tidal wave over my heart. As I look at Xavier, at all these happy, priceless moments we made last night and the many days before, it reminds me that I’m only tying more string to him and the others that will have to be cut. I don’t doubt that these moments are special, that they matter to me and to us, but they will just make things ha-rder in the end. I know that it alre-ady is.
I have to love him enough so that I can let him go. The Shifters nee-d to be saved, and potentially the human race as well. The werewolves won’t have to kill Shifters in order to feel useful anymore. From what Ray said, the werewolves may cease to exist as I know them. I’m not sure that I know that means, but even so all I am left with is the urgency and inevitability of my mission.
Do I nee-d to say goodbye?
No. I can’t.
It… will only make things ha-rder.
I whirl around and bend down to drop a gentle k!sson Xavier’s forehead. “Sleep ti-ght, Xavier,” I say, standing up quic-kly and hvgging the crown to my che-st. The whispers are pounding, imploring, begging me to make a change. My heart constricts, because I know that I cannot leave an entire species at risk due to any of my own selfish de-sires. Because in my heart, I cannot truly believe that Shifters are evil and don’t deserve salvation. And who am I to rob them of that?
plea-se. Come soon.
I start running at a breakn£¢k speed, weaving throu-gh the trees without knowing quite where I’m going. Allowing the whispers to guide my thoughts, I keep moving, endlessly, ma-king the decision to accept my fate. Occasionally it seems like a red eye appears to my right, almost as if a trick of the light. It seems as if the Shifters are guiding me towards my own destiny. They always have, I suppose. The tragedy that ended my parents’ lives has propelled me to fight, both against and for the Shifters.
The castle turrets soon appear to the left of the trees and I automatically steer towards it. Even though I have no idea on how to navigate throu-gh the castle, I have no doubt that I will get there. I reach the gates and they eerily begin to open. I don’t even st©p to look, my conscience not allowing me to wait.
The door to the castle is similarly left ajar. After a few minutes of going throu-gh doors and weaving throu-gh darkly lit corridors, I reach a hallway that I recognize. With thick carpet and elaborate door handles, I knew this was the entrance to the core.
Meet your future.
Knowing that it’s too late to go back, I swing the door open to reveal the dark space I had been envisioning since the previous night. The anticipation re-leases, and I stare around the room blankly, not knowing where to start.
There are no illusions of grandeur. This is it, with the plain, dark room and the eternal darkness below. Is it supposed to end like this?
I walk over to the middle of the ledge, not sure where the edges blurred into the void. The silence is unnerving as I f!nger the crown in my hands. Should I just throw it over so I don’t risk falling myself? That would probably be the least heroic thing to do.
Now that I’ve finally decided to be a hero, the question is how this will go down in God’s scra-pbook or wherever this will be written down. Should I pose for a minute, or fight the evil dragon who appears out of nowhere? I’m not used to this kind of life.
I almost wish the influence of the whispers were back and as strong as they were, because I could really use their help.
I start walking to the ledge, when I start to hear footsteps pounding down the hallway. My heart rate accelerates wildly as a figure begins to come into view. I can ba-rely see it, but I would recognize his frenzied breaths everywhere.
I would have probably picked the dragon over this.
Tears unwillingly come to my eyes as the figure runs to me, his hand immediately gr-abbing my shoulder. “Xavier… didn’t expect to see you here,” I say softly, kicking myself for as-suming he wouldn’t be able to follow me.
“What’s going on?” He asks, ti-ght£ñing his grip. “I’m tired of you and Ray not telling me everything. First he acts strange, and then you. What’s so special about this room?”
I begin to break down un-der his urgent stare. I’m tired of trying to keep things from him, because he deserves to have the truth, even if it hurts. “It’s the prophecy, Xavier. This is all the prophecy. I’m about to fulfill it.”
He just stares at me wonderingly. “So… this is the red stone?” He motions to the crown. “Is this what you were trying to do yesterday?”
“Yes. Ray is p@rt of the prophecy too, Xavier… everything fits. The fight on the beach, Ray being taken hostage… everything. And all the dreams I had of this world, they were all leading me to this very point.”
“So Ray is the one that we… lost in the group? But we found him again!” He says, trying to figure out the complexity of the situation. His eyes search mine, and his hands reach to f!nger the crown in my hand. “Whose is this?” Xavier asks softly, “was it just sitting here, or…”
“It’s Ray’s. He isn’t what you think he is. And neither are the enemies that you hate and kill. The Shifters… are souls. Dying, polluted souls.”
“But that makes no s-en-se.” His eyebrows furrow in confusion. “In order for the red stone to be his, that would make him… the red wolf? Who else could be in possession of such an important object?” I just nod at him, and he almost jumps ten feet backwards. “How? I’ve known him for my entire life. And I’m pretty sure Shifters are evil.”
“He is still Ray. Believe me. He’s just… slightly different. And a lot older than you think he is. But I have to destroy this jewel and crown in order to fulfill the prophecy, and Ray said that it must be thrown into the chasm of eternal darkness that surrounds us. The Shifters aren’t all bad either. You’ve seen the ones hidden within the forest.”
Xavier surveys our surroundings, his gaze cold and calculating. “So, what happens to us? You throw it in, the red stone is destroyed…”
“Well, the Shifters will be able to move on to judgement. Werewolves will cease to exist as we know it. I’m still not sure what that means.” Xavier’s face crinkles up as I mention the fated words, and his hands leave the crown to wra-p around my b©dy.
“Are you saying that you were basically going to leave me forever without giving me a chance to say goodbye? After everything I told you last night?” He asks fervently, his breath impossibly close to my ear. I find myself shaking with the threat of indecision.
“I knew it would… make it ha-rder, Xavier. I knew I couldn’t leave you if I did it. And even now, I just want to stay with you forever. But the human race is hanging in the balance, along with the hope of salvation for the pas-sing souls. It’s… bigger than just us…”
He ti-ght£ñs his arms until I can ba-rely breathe. “I un-derstand,” he whispers softly into my hair, “You wouldn’t be you if you avoided this forever. You have a strong s-en-se of justice and I love that about you.”
I smile and he k!sses the t©p of my head slowly. His hands ru-b down the sides of my w@!st, and I revel once more in his warmth. For the last time I guess. “I’m hoping, Xavier… that there may be happiness for the two of us.”
“Oh, I know that this is not truly goodbye. We have each other in our hearts, and will never be alone. I will always have your lovely face to remind me of the peace in my heart.” Xavier leans his head against mine and then re-leases me, stepping back. I blus-h, smiling at the weight of his words and the beautiful warmth that comes with it.
“So it’s okay, Xavier? I’m sorry about hiding things from you. I just didn’t want you to know… that I was going to end it.”
“But I always knew, Mona. Don’t forget, I knew you were the chos£n one for a very long time. And I can put two and two together. Now, I don’t know what the Shifters have done and exactly what they are, but I do think that you are righteous and will give them whatever identity and salvation they deserve.” He smiles at me for what seems to be the last time, dampened by the inevitability of our futures. “But you nee-d to do it, quic-kly. I think that some Shifters are coming back, because I’m starting to hear noises.”
It’s true. The whispers are swirling around again, twisting into howls and whimpers. These are not the sounds of begging, weak Shifters but power-hungry monsters. And the sounds seem to be getting closer and closer, accompanied by another pair of footsteps into the darkness of the room. “Mona?” Ray’s unmistakable voice calls out, echoing against the unfathomable walls. As he comes close to where we are, I can make out his face, torn with exhaustion and fear. “Oh, Xavier, I should have known you were here too. Look, you have a few seconds, maybe less. I know you’re here for a reason. Don’t let anything take away from that. You have the power to save, but the window of time is quic-kly closing upon us all. I’ll try to hold them back, but…”
“Them?” Xavier asks, his voice cracking in the growing intensity of the howling.
“The council members, those who wish to stay in power and keep the status quo. They mean to tra-p you here. They led you in, and now they are going to svçkyour emotions and feelings for each other until there’s nothing left. Turns out, Shifters don’t actually keep prisoners in dungeons. Sorry about that little lie, Xavier.”
“Seems like you’ve been keeping a lot hidden from me, Brother,” Xavier says loudly. “Why don’t you show me your true self? There’s no reason to hide anymore.”
The two stare at each other, the rest of the world completely forgotten. The escalating tension starts to fade away as Ray sighs, dropping his shoulders and argumentative stance. He also knows that Xavier deserves the truth.
“You’re right.” Ray starts to morph, his edges twisting and fading, only to reveal seconds later a similar outline with slightly different yet significant facial features. “It’s ha-rd to show my true self, though, when the only thing true to me is my eyes of blood.”
Xavier seems frozen for a second, and then frowns. “It’s true then. Are you a Shifter, or a werewolf?”
“Both, it seems. But I’m pretty sure I nee-d judgement more than anyone else in this world and the next. We’ve all pla-yed into Fate’s hands, but our own wills and de-sires dictate our own identities, and no one can rob us of that if you save us. I’m probably supposed to fight you right now, but I don’t wish to live in such a stagnant world, chained to a role where I have to watch countless souls die to the outside world. I almost forgot about it, though, when I was with you. Thank you, Mona and Xavier, for giving me the opportunity to have a life worth living.” Ray grins wi-dely, his expression tinged with hopeless insanity. “plea-se don’t hate me too much. I really like you guys, you know. In fact, I’ll take care of these guys for you.”
Shifters bur-st in the doors like a dark, stormy cloud, taking over the darkness and plunging it into an even dee-per, chaotic madness. I can only watch as Ray starts to morph with the movement of the ever changing cloud, eyes like fire burning into his victims. But the mas-s of Shifters seems to converge upon him, almost swallowing him at the base of the ledge. “It’s not over! I’m fine, but you nee-d to go now!” We hear the faint yell echoing around the room, spurring us into action.
I race over to the edge of the ledge, or what it appeared to be like, and cautiously looked into the eternal blackness. Xavier holds my arm, as if afraid of my movement. “It’s okay, Xavier. It has to be now,” I whisper.
“But… I love you. I haven’t said it enough yet. And we haven’t grown old together, if you could even call it that. And I haven’t said half of the things that I wanted to say about you, and we haven’t bickered over whose taking the last of the cereal, and…” He pauses as the tears start to flow from my eyes, drenching my face and his che-st in sorrow as he pu-lls me to him.
“We will. I promise.” I smile weakly, glancing over at the dark cloud as it starts to separate into individual beings heading in all directions. “I just nee-d to take care of some things first.” A small, sharp spear forms in my hand, and I offer it to him. “Take this, and protect yourself. I’m going now.”
“Going?” He gr-abs the spear, looking at the looming Shifters and pointing it at them. “You’re staying right with me.”
“Not today,” I whisper, looking into the chasm and knowing that more Shifters alre-ady had flown into them, hoping for a chance to gr-ab the crown. I can’t let go of it, because Shifters can gr-ab physical items in this world. Which can mean only one thing.
I will save you, not just for you, but so I will never lose any idea of what I know myself to be.
I back away, and then launch myself in a run towards the chasm. “Mona!” Xavier yells urgently, but I am a perpetual, moving f0rç£, curving around the singular object so that nothing can get to it without getting throu-gh me. The last thing I see as I fall into the darkness is Xavier running after me while batting away a frenzied Shifter. His expression falls as he realizes he can’t catch up, and the Shifter pounces on him as if he were a wounded animal.
I’m not sure I wanted a heroic ending quite like this, but I am still unafraid. No one can hurt me now and no one can take this role away from me. Even if I die, I am bringing life to the world and beyond. Besides, if Xavier isn’t with me, what would be left in the end?
Come home. Be free.
I smile as I fall into a darkness so de-ep that it erases everything, the crown finally falling from my hands into the unreachable, my eyes closing softly as a comforting f0rç£ embr@ces my b©dy, carrying me to eternal deliverance.
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