A howl at night episode 33 & 34

??A Howl In The Night??
?She’s mine?
?From Novel r0m@n�

?Chapter 34

 

?

Short Nights, Endless Days ∞

My eyes open quic-kly, and I survey my surroundings. The t-shi-ts from the night before are scattered across the cave, the fire only consisting of cold ashes. From what I can tell, the sky is still full of low-lying fog and heavy mist, the rain having retreated far into the horizon. I can’t really see the sun, if there even is one in this world, but only the gray darkness.

With grace that I didn’t know I had, I slowly edge to my feet and pad over to the mas-s of clothes to my side, careful to not j£rk the rope binding my ankle. Chills take hold of my b©dy, and I shiver as the wind brushes against my n£¢k. My clothes still feel pretty we-t, though not quite as soa-ked as last night. I pick up my long, flowing shi-t and ring it out, getting rid of the excess water, and tie it around my w@!st as a makeshift Sk-irt. There is no way I am putting those soa-ked p@n-ts on, especially with this stupid rope to mess things up.

Xavier shifts in his sleep, scaring me as I hear the disruption in his breathing. I beg him inwardly to not wake up. Preferably, never. I don’t want to have to face him ever again.

My hands still burn from the shame of last night, and I don’t want to have to think about that event, or even him. Everything is all too firmly embe-dded in my thoughts, displa-yed in crystal clear definition in my mind. I would do anything to get a delete bu-tton in my mind, to wipe these away from my br@in forever. Anything to get rid of that burning k!ss.

I want to say I’ve forgotten it alre-ady. And maybe if I just want it enough…

His breathing steadies, causing me to sigh in relief. The next question that comes to my mind is how to get out of my current situation. Being tied to this guy makes me sick and I can’t deal with it any longer.

I scan the room, and my gaze lands on my makeshift pillow right next to Xavier’s head. A lightbulb goes off in my head as I remember Xavier shuffling throu-gh the knapsack last night. Surely there has to be some sort of knife or sharp object in that mystery bag of his.

But it’s so close to him, I don’t know if I can get it without waking him up. Is that a risk I really want to take?

I lean against the wall, feeling both the swirling mist and the aches in my stomach. If nothing else, I will at least get a good breakfast out of this challenge…either of the rope I’ll end up chewing off or that weird fruit in his backpack.

It is really strange how I end up losing all my newfound poise at the prospect of seeing his stupid green eyes again. Practically stumbling over to his side, I lean against the wall to avoid tripping over the rope. A sudden, intense drumming erupts in the cave, reverberating around the walls. It takes me a moment to look down and realize that the unnerving sound is coming from my own che-st.

There’s no way he can’t hear this thun-derous, embarras-sing heartbeat. I crouch down and survey his back, watching initially for his breathing and then inevitably falling into a trance over his sparkling blue hair. I don’t un-derstand how this idiot can have such glossy, shiny hair when it’s so dark in here that I can ba-rely make out anything. We haven’t even bathed yet, so how his hair doesn’t look oily is just beyond me. Speaking of bathing…

I sniff my un-derarms, scrunching my nose in disgust as the slight odor is magnified throu-gh my overly s-en-sitive nose. A good, long bath should be at the t©p of my to-do list.

I almost forget why I am even by his side, but a quic-k kick to the head—mentally—knocks me out of my daze. Knife. I nee-d something sharp, and something tasty.

Turning away from him, I get on my knees to shuffle throu-gh the knapsack. The first thing I see is a wallet, accompanied by sunglas-ses, disgusting socks, and a dingy blanket. A lot of junk—pla-ying cards, pens, and a clean brush. I stare at the brush for a minute, and then take it in my hand. I might use this.

A tiny fruit sits at the bo-ttomof all the mess, and I snatch it greedily. I try to justify taking it to myself, blinded by hunger. It’s not stealing, it’s just borrowing. Without the giving back p@rt.

Disappointingly, I don’t see anything that could possibly break these bonds. There’s some nail cli-ppers, but they look like the baby version or something. They don’t look like they could cut any decently sized nails, much less ropes.

A muffled scream escapes me as an arm swings over my shoulders, pu-lling me down to the floor. My legs become tangled with the ropes and Xavier’s legs, and I feel a pulsating warmth coming from his b©dy. My eyes are covered by his hand, and I am tugged against his che-st. I am still in a state of shock at this point.

The terrifying sound of his breathing as it permeates my ear j£rks me into high gear, and I push him away with all my strength. To my surprise, his head snaps back and his grip loos-en-s, allowing me to crawl as far as I can manage away from him. I cast a glance at him, and am shocked to see his eyes slowly opening and blinking furiously in the process. If I didn’t know better, I’d think he was just now waking up.

“Why’d you kick me…?” He asks while ru-bbing his eyes, and my fears are confirmed.

I don’t answer him, focusing on the rope. Placing my hands on it, I f0rç£fully pu-ll it in two directions. I can see the rope start to give un-derneath the pressure.

I can feel him watching me as I rip it ap@rt while marveling at how easy it was to do so. If I had just done that earlier, I wouldn’t have had to worry about getting into his knapsack.

“Mona, what are you doing?” His voice is low, tinged with drowsiness.

I turn away while prying my half of the rope off my foot. I don’t want to talk to him. Or listen to him.

“Mona…” I can s-en-se him coming closer, and edge against the wall. The rope splits at my ankle, falling on the floor. At my current location in the alcove, there is no escape, no place for me to hide.

“Mona.” He repeats himself, his arms suddenly on my shoulders. All the strength is su-cked out of my b©dy as he whirls me around. “Look at me.” One of his hands cu-ps my chin and lifts it so I am f0rç£d to meet his eyes.

As I look at him, hoping to keep calm and collected, my face grows red in a betraying manifestation of the turmoil stirring inside my b©dy. His green eyes bore into my soul, and I imagine my appearance in response resembles a deer caught in the headlights. All I can think is that I nee-d to get out. Get out… before I lose myself.

“What’s going on?” His hand travels from my chin to my cheek, brushing down towards my n£¢k.

The action reminds me of last night, and I j£rk away with sudden ferocity. “Nothing,” I mutter, looking at the ground. “Nothing is going on.”

He opens his mouth to speak, but I throw the fruit in my hand at his face before he can say anything. “Just st©p.”

Instantly regretting the action after a brief recognition of the pain in Xavier’s features, I whirl around to face the outdoors and immediately start running. My stomach roars with nee-d, but I am unwilling to turn and retrieve the fruit. If I turn back, I could lose everything in that stare of his. I could feel that same, indescribable de-sire that drives me insane.

Somehow I just know that something about him is different. Different from the rest of my haras-sers in this forlorn world, different from my past recollections and pres£nt emotions. It’s a ha-rd thing for me to describe, quite honestly, because I can’t even begin to un-derstand it myself. In this case, the word “different”must take on a myriad of implications and interpretations to reflect the chaos erupting within my own heart. I feel hatred, yet I feel an undeniable attra-ction. I want to sl@p his face and stro-ke his cheek. But for the other people I have encountered here…nothing fazes me.

I think what I am so afraid of may be the intensity of my feelings. Regardless of what they are, they exist, and they are pres£nted in a way that is near impossible to ignore. There is strange beauty in this new revelation—that I can feel, and do so strongly—but also great terror as I witness the control it holds over my b©dy. I almost…want to be subjected to the pretty boy’s reign of terror. It gives me shivers to imagine slee-ping next to him again, to see his smooth skin and irritating, perfect face. Which is exactly why I must escape, and do it quic-kly.

I must keep all of this shame and emotion locked within my b©dy, because what I truly nee-d is strength, not weakness, in such an empty land. Weakness invites trouble, and I can’t take any more of that, especially if it comes in the form of a blue-haired werewolf.

The biggest problem here is that it just seems like I can’t escape, no matter how ha-rd I try.

Large hands wra-p around my w@!st, and I lose my balance, falling towards the rou-gh ground. I am immediately enveloped in an embr@ce, the warmth spre-ading throu-ghout my entire b©dy. Everything happening in an instant, the only thing I truly notice is the sickly sweet aroma surrounding me, almost pungent in strength.

And then it’s over, and strangely I feel none of the impact of the collision. My personal pillow, whether he or she meant to be one or not, has saved me. But he or she also provoked me to trip anyways, so I don’t feel sorry at all.

The familiarity in my savior’s gesture reminds me of Xavier, as well as the feel of his hands on the small of my back. I look up, fully expecting to see his face, but nearly jump ten feet away in the surprise that Ray is in front of me instead.

“Wha…what…”My voice cracks and stumbles, coming out in an embarras-sing stutter.

“Nice to see you again,”he comments, a sm-irk on the corner of his features. “So, you survived the night with the monster?”His eyes crinkle as he laughs, twisting around as he does so. Now I am on the ground, with him on his hands and knees above me.

“ba-rely,”I mutter, scrambling to my knees and away from Ray, who is casually standing up and grinning annoyingly at the same time. When he smiles like this, he almost looks like his brother…and it just makes me want to keep running.

“Where are you going?”he asks as he sees me backing away, trying to be conspicuous but obviously not enough to fool him. “The group’s in that direction.”He points to the west, which is definitely not where I am headed.

“Uh, I wanted to head down to the river and take a bath.”I make my excuse quic-kly, and his eyes narrow in response.

“There is no river around here. There’s a pond, where the group is.”He smiles, but in a slightly more menacing way that chills me to the bone. “So why don’t you follow me over there and we can gr-ab some food. You must be hungry.”

My stomach grumbles, ma-king me wince. Maybe it would be better to stick with the group, as long as I can somehow prevent myself from seeing him. If not anything else, I could still gr-ab a bite to eat from wherever they’re getting it.

He reaches out and gr-abs my arm, his grip like iron. It is then that I hear the crackling of br@nches and the pounding of feet. I start to squirm in Ray’s hold, fear taking hold of my heart.

“Mona?”A frenzied call echoes throu-ghout the forest as Xavier races into the clearing, his breathing heavy and erratic. His eyes first land on me, and then slide down to our linked arms. He then surveys Ray, probably trying to put everything together. His face clouds over, and his eyes return to meet my own. I instantly look away, blu-shing furiously and cursing myself for doing it. “Were you…”

“Bringing her back to camp? Yes.”Ray jumps in, supposedly saving Xavier from ma-king false as-sumptions. Although I don’t know why I even care if he makes them or not. “She was looking for a bath and I was trying to help her get to the pond near here.”

“Oh…”Xavier blus-hes, looking downwards and then up towards me, “so that’s why…”

I guess this is better than nothing. It would be bothersome if he thought Ray and I were doing anything.

I sl@p myself mentally and once again…wonder why I care.

We start walking in complete silence, the awkwardness stretching between us. I don’t look at the others, staring straight ahead and trying to wipe my mind of all stupid thoughts. There are many swirling around in my head, seeking to distract me from the matter at hand.

What now? I don’t have many options, and Ray has just eliminated the stupidest one of them. Running away is just not a possibility when my companions are so much stronger than I am. And it also seems like running doesn’t bring me farther away from my problems in this world, but only draws me closer to them.

“Ray, why did you know where I was?”I ask him in a cli-pped tone, my feet crunching on the dead gras-s. I try to keep my voice unwavering, betraying none of the uncertainty within me. “If the camp is way over there, then…”

“Oh, I was just trying to find some more fruit. It seems like these plants only grow near water, though, so I found nothing. Well, except for you.”Ray walks a little fas-ter to match my pace, and I can see the amusement in his eyes as he regards the two of us. I want to change my stiff expression, for I know he is going to think that something has happened, but somehow I just can’t make myself look indifferent. “Had an argument, huh?”He asks tea-singly, just as I guessed he would.

I sneak a glance over to the side, watching Xavier’s expression in response to Ray’s words. He looks confused, his face tilted in embarras-sment. I feel a little guilty for a moment, and then snap out of my contemplative stupor. It seems like I’m doing that a lot around him lately, and I don’t like it.

My footsteps quic-ken as I hear growing voices from the clearing. Ray dances in front of me, speeding up even more, and twists around so that he is not even looking where he is going but is staring back at the two of us. A mocking grin is on his features, annoying me to no end. “Aren’t you two going to k!ssand make up before we reach the others? Can’t have any hostility in the camp.”He tea-singly twists his hands into the shape of a heart and makes a k!ss!ngnoise with hisl-ips. My hands clench in anger.

“Mona…”Xavier’s low voice murmurs cautiously beside me as a spirit spear begins to materialize in my hand. “What are you doing?”

I take de-ep breaths as I look downwards, surprised at the weapon I had created. The sharp edges slowly dissipate into fine p@rticles, b!own away by the wisps of the wind as I concentrate on controlling my anger.

That’s really weird. Usually my spear doesn’t appear unless I’m at least focused on it. I wonder if the decreasing lack of control I am having over my fury has anything to do with it.

When I look up, eyes wi-de, I see Ray’s own eyes locked onto my clenched palm with an unfamiliar expression on his face. I can’t quite decipher his emotions from that one expression, and I usually pride myself on my ability to do so.

“Are you okay, Mona?”Xavier asks me gently, his hand tou-ching my arm. He has gotten so much closer over the last few seconds, s£nding my br@in into an emotional overload.

“I’m fine. Sorry. I don’t know what c@m£ over me,”I say quietly, causing him to step back at the iron laced within my response. I am determined to treat him normally, like any other person. I will not trifle with silly emotions I am not destined to feel.

I look up—my mistake—to see a pair of eyes, glittering with golden flecks within a green meadow that continues endlessly throu-ghout the horizon. They are as dark as the night, yet shine with the brightness of a perfectly cut jewel. They push you away, almost forbidding in their abnormality, yet somehow you get tugged towards them anyways, pu-ll-ed in by the mysteries of their vast depths.

I lose the lucidity of free thought for a few seconds, and then furiously snap my face away. My cheeks burning in embarras-sment, I try to shut out all noises, all of Ray’s stupid reactions, and most importantly, Xavier.

I walk throu-gh the bushes quic-kly to reach the clearing, leaving the rest behind, and at the center is a decently sized pond. I almost scream as a figure starts to get out of the pond, heading for his clothes on the rock.

I feel people around me as I instantly twist around and put my hands over my head. “What’s wrong, Mona?”Ray whispers close to my ear, completely back to normal.

“M-m-man…”I stammer. “N-n-ked…”My eyes still stay ti-ghtly shut.

“Oh.”Ray sounds nonchalant. “Haven’t you ever seen a n-ked man before?”

“Ray… shut up,”I whine, “tell me when he has clothes on.”There is something about this awareness that shouldn’t faze me, but it does anyways. I don’t get why I’m so adverse to things that are so silly and reflect my innocence.

“Yi!”He shouts, “Put your clothes on!”There is silence for a moment, and then I feel a rou-gh tapping on my head. “He’s done, princess.”

“Don’t call me princess.”I punch him in the arm after raising my head, scowling at the sm-irk on his face. He gr-abs my arm, bringing it throu-gh his own with such f0rç£ that I can ha-rd ly resist.

“Let me esc-rt you, princess,”He says, unperturbe-d. His eyes are scanning the area, but then return to mine as quic-kly as they left. “Mona, I’m teasing.”Ray’s tone seems slightly more apologetic now, though still twisted with laughter. “Don’t be offended.”

I want to sma-ck him so badly on his pompous, arrogant face.

We start walking towards the pond, I furiously tugging on my captured hand, he grinning smugly as if the expression has been plastered onto his features. He keeps my hand securely locked within his hold, and I am unable to do anything against him. I look behind me, and Xavier is meandering a few paces behind me. He is looking down, but with my glance his gaze travels upwards to meet mine again. A strange panic floods over me and I quic-kly turn to face Ray. A strange, incomprehensible look was on Xavier’s face, and for some reason the expression made me feel undeniably guilty.

“Sorry, Mona. I wasn’t thinking,”Yi calls, now wearing torn and dirty p@n-ts. He uses his t-shi-t to dry off his b©dy. I try not to look at his glistening skin.

“No problem,”I mumble, feeling embarras-sed. I don’t even know where to look anymore, and my eyes roam across the clearing. A small area catches my eye, and I see the tiny fruits peppered among several bushes near the water. “Is that where you guys got the fruit?”I ask, distracted by the prospect of getting food.

“Yeah, those are the only living bushes we have found around here,”Yi says contemplatively, “seems like they only grow around water sources.”

“Yeah, Ray said something about that. I wonder if these are plants that are just drawn to water, or if there is any other reason for their location.”I walk over to the plant, surveying the roots and the stems.

“Even though this is a forest, this is really the only p@rt we’ve seen so far that truly seems living,”Ray comments, his feet clomping on the gray gras-s as he comes over. “Isn’t it weird how everything here just looks so gray, as if we just stepped in a picture book? Even these stems and leaves on the plant has a grayish tinge to it.”

I have to admit, Ray is right. The veins on the leaves are a de-ep gray, as if the very ess£nce of this world is contained within them. f!ngering the leaves with my hand, I wince as a sharp edge slices into my skin. “What the cra-p?”I mutter as bright red pulsates from my br@nd new injury on my thumb. It throbs, leading me to believe that this is not the everyday paper cut.

“Mona,”a de-ep, seemingly s-en-suous voice in my delirium speaks. “Let me see that.”Large hands envelop my own, and soon both are stained with blood. The red drops from both of our hands onto the plant, and it tinges the leaves with somehow depressing accuracy. From where I am squ-atting, the leaf is almost bleeding like I am, a dark green in the roots but crimson in the edges.

My cheeks match my f!ngersagain as Xavier wra-ps a small rag around my thumb. “Be more careful,”he says softly, with a worried tone. “That cut is super de-ep. In fact, I’m surprised the plant was able to inflict that much damage.”His hands leave mine to t©uçh the leaf, dancing across the same edges.

I say nothing in response, standing up quic-kly while ignoring the throbbing in both my heart and my thumb. “W-where’s the others?”I quic-kly address Ray and Yi, who are both sm-irking.

“Danae is just beyond the clearing, exploring for anything of interest with Griffin. And besides her…this is it.”Ray motions to the four of us. “Well, that we know of.”

“Last time I checked, you were missing as well,”I comment wryly. “What changed?”

“I was found, obviously.”

I glare at him, wondering how one person could possibly get on my nerves to such an extent. I decide not to comment on that statement for fear of an imminent explosion on my p@rt. “So tell me about what happened to you right until you were found by the group.”

“Well, quite simply, I woke up in this forest all alone, wandered around, and bu-mped into Xavier while he was frantically running around trying to find you. It was quite hilarious actually.”Ray boisterously strikes a grief-stricken pose. “He literally looked like this, and his cheeks were a beautiful cherry red. Isn’t that right, Xavier?”

“Shut up,”Xavier mutters, glaring at the instigator with the same annoyance I had just displa-yed seconds earlier. However, I felt a fli-cker of interest in Ray’s remark, something I probably shouldn’t feel un-der the circu-mtances.

He catches the glimmer in my eye and smiles wickedly. “Want some of the scoop on your fellow lovebird?”He wi-nks, and for a second his face looks almost exactly like Xavier’s. My heart starts unintentionally pounding, and I forget to scold him for ma-king Xavier and I seem like a couple.

“Hello lovely!”A sweet, youthful voice calls out as Danae enters the clearing, Griffin in tow. She is nearly dragging him for some reason, and is otherwise empty handed. “Hello, everyone else.”

“What did you find?”Yi asks lightly, bounding over to her. He is definitely the most excited of the bunch, with Xavier nonchalant and Ray disturbe-d over the fact that she didn’t call him a “lovely”.

“Nothing much. Just the same forest, extending on for ages.”She shrugs, shoving some sticks together with her foot. “Who knows how far it could stretch.”

Griffin looks up to catch my eye. At the sight of me, his ti-ght facial expression immediately relaxes and he smiles. Caught off guard, his infectious smile brings a smile of my own to my features.

“Well buddy,”he says brightly, stepping forward taking my hand into his own. “So glad to see you.”

“Well buddy?”I ask, s-en-sing a burning gaze drilling into my back. Subconsciously I shiver.

“You know…because we were in the well together. Get it?”He laughs. I stare at him pointedly. “Yeah, it’s a bad name,”Griffin says bashfully after he sees my expression, “but I like it.”

“I don’t want to talk about wells ever again,”I gro-an , sli-pping my hand out of his. “But I appreciate the s£ntiment, whatever it is.”

Danae smiles at our exchange, and my gaze turns to her. “So it’s morning, huh?”I ask, noting her youthful appearance. She smiles.

“Most likely.”Danae nods, and then wrinkles her nose. “Mona, you nee-d a bath. No offense.”

“I’ve been dying to have one all morning,”I mumble, casting a glance at Ray, who’s snickering.

“Well, let’s not prevent you from doing so any longer. Guys, leave.”

Murmured gro-an s echo from the group. Backing away, Yi was the first to leave, and the rest trailed behind. Xavier takes up the back, eyeing the others suspiciously. I watch until their bodies fade into the trees. “That was too easy,”I say, narrowing my eyes.

“I’ll go keep them in check,”Danae replies comfortingly, “and make sure they don’t sneak over here. For right now, just focus on yourself. You’ve had a ha-rd time so far, lovely.”My nose crinkles at the use of such familiarity, but in some way it is almost relaxing to my ears. Something about the phoenae makes me feel so welcome…and safe.

“Okay. I won’t be long.”I smile, and she disappears into the trees. Once again, I am completely alone.

This could be my chance. This group is so gullible, and it would be so easy.

Even as I think this, my mind flashes back to Ray’s arms as he gr@bb£d me, and the well as I fell inside. Seems like running away brings me nothing but trouble. And given that these fruits are the only nourishment we have seen so far, I could very well starve without the group’s help.

quic-kly giving up on that possibility, I begin to re-move the t-shi-t around my w@!st. I nearly rip it in the process, but eventually it’s strewn across the gras-s along with my other t-shi-t. Feeling a s-en-se of exhilaration, I lower myself into the pond, which is a strange crystal blue color that does not fit at all with its surroundings. The water care-sses my skin, warmth spre-ading throu-gh my b©dy and disarming me of all my defenses. I lean my head against the ground while soaking in the soothing waters.

As I rest, I reflect on our time here. I remember that in the other world the pack consisted of Ray, Xavier, Yi, and two others. What were their names…?

Wes. Right. And Drake…. no, it’s Jake. I envision the two, wondering where they could possibly be. It’s ha-rd to picture them in my head, but I can ba-rely make out Wes’s golden locks and Jake’s sparkling buzz cut. A pain strikes my heart, and alarm fli-ckers across my features as I realize that I miss them.

It really has been a whirlwind, a crazy journey from when I almost died in the forest until I almost died in a forest yet again. I lost track of time, but I am sure that it hasn’t been too long since that time—a month, maybe two—and seemingly shorter considering that sheer amount of events that occurred during the time period.

I never considered myself an adventurer or even an interesting person, yet I have been lucky, or unlucky depending on how you look at it, enough to land in a ton of situations that have been eye-opening in a number of different ways. And it all started with Xavier, when he saved me from that monstrous hail. A certain haziness fills a gaping hole in my memory as I try to remember the events directly after that, such as how he introduced himself, how he c@m£ to my school. However, I somehow know it happened, and could remember certain scenes, such as when he was in my be-droom at the orphanage, and when he brou-ght me steak in the lunchroom. I reminisce in the swirling memories, and a slight smile comes to myl-ips before I know it. As if suddenly realizing the depths of my emotions, I try to banish the feelings from my mind, yet they only grow stronger in response. It disconcerts me that there are things I can’t remember, that things are foggy in my mind to such an extent.

I wonder if there isn’t any truth to the ramblings that the rest of my group had uttered when we first arrived. Maybe I’m the crazy one that’s causing all the trouble. Maybe these people mean more to me than I realize.

My head snaps up as I suddenly s-en-se a pres£nce around me. I can also hear shouting in the distance, probably Danae and Ray’s voices. “W-who’s there?” I ask warily, trying to cover myself in the frustratingly clear water.

“I’m… not looking,” A low murmur reaches my ears, “I promise.”

I twist in my position to see Xavier inching towards me, covering his eyes with the back of his hand. I try to feel irritation, but only curiosity enters my mind. I don’t feel nearly as threatened as I should be.

“I just wanted to drop off your extra clothes that you left in the cave,” he says, lowering the clothes onto the ground. “I thought you might want them. They are dry now.”

His thoughtfulness surprises me in more ways than one. After only a few seconds, I s-en-se nothing at all. He just… left.

I don’t know if I was expecting anything, but something about the encounter just left me feeling a bit empty. After this series of continuously exciting events, this bath is turning out to be a bit anti-climatic.

I probably should get out, so I don’t make them wait too long. It’s been a few minutes, and I feel thor0ûghly cleaned, both in b©dy and in soul. I know its a cliche, but it’s been a long time since I have felt so relaxed.

Putting my hands on the ground, I start to push myself out of the water. Right before I get out, I hear a sharp intake of breath, and I fall back into the pond. Suddenly shivering, I watch with alarm as Xavier jumps out of the trees, heading for some unknown location. He seems to circle some random area near the edge of the clearing, as if eyeing his prey, and pounces.

A squeal erupts as Xavier grasps at air, almost as if locking it into an embr@ce. “Xavier, that hurts!” The air g@sps. I think I’m about to have a heart attack.

“You can st©p now,” Xavier growls, now putting the air into a headlock. “And no excuses.”

Suddenly a man starts to materialize, a wi-de grin on his face. As his face appears, I realize that the intruder is Yi. My eyes narrow into slits. “It was a joke,” Yi says laughingly, “I was just pas-sing by.”

Xavier says nothing, glaring at him with seemingly laser vision. “Okay,” Yi continues, maybe a bad joke.”

“Look, Yi. We nee-d to learn to trust each other, to feel safe with each other, and even though you think it’s not a big deal, in this you are tearing down what everyone has worked to build up.” Xavier gr-abs him and pu-lls him into the bushes. “Sorry, Mona!” He calls on his way out, never once looking at me.

I stare after him for who-knows-how-long, while entertaining conflicting thoughts about him and the rest of the world, and then sink into the the sparkling depths of the warm waters with exhaustion.

* * *

“So, what next?” Ray asks, looking at all of our faces. We stare back, as clueless as he is. Silence reigns between us, and not even the sounds of insects or birds are heard. I shift restlessly in my seat on the dark gray rock.

“We nee-d to find Wes and Jake,” Xavier finally says with a commanding tone, “I’m sure they are around here somewhere.”

“So far, everyone has all been found within the same ten mile radius. Maybe scouting out the rest of this area will prove fruitful,” Danae says calculatively, staring at a notebook in her hand. “We still have a lot we haven’t covered.”

“I say we look for water,” I speak up f0rç£fully. “There isn’t a limitless amount of food near that tiny little pond, no matter how filling the fruit is. And if on that journey we find Wes and Jake, great. If we don’t, we can always go back and look for them with a significantly higher chance of survival on both sides.” I can see Yi and Griffin nodding after my suggestion. Xavier just looks back at me with displea-sure.

“I think Mona is right. Let’s just gather up all our resources and all the fruit on those bushes, and head towards the outSk-irts of the forest,” Ray says firmly.

“Is there even an end to this forest?” Danae asks wonderingly. Her question marks a similar concern for all of us. Are we really here just to die in this empty wasteland?

Why are we even here, anyways?

I think back to the dozens of visions I have had over the past month, searching for some clue to lead us on the right path. Castle doors, tall mountains, and endless forests flash before my eyes. I do remember seeing an ocean or lake of some kind before… but where was it?

After pondering ha-rd , I point to the north of us. “It’s that way.”

“What?” Ray asks, looking at me with a dubious expression.

“Water. I figure that since we are at the base of the mountains, the lake should be directly north of here. Although I don’t know how far away it is.”

I can feel all of the eyes on me, ma-king me fidget uncomfortably. “How do you know that?” Ray shoots back, and then abruptly stands up from his position on the fallen log. “In fact, do you know something about how we got here in the first place? And what here even is?” He steps closer to me, and I shake involuntarily.

“Ray.” Xavier stands up and puts his hand in front of Ray to gently push him away from me. “Don’t be so overbearing. She can’t take too much at once.”

“No, Xavier,” He brushes past him, flinging aside his arm. “I think Mona owes us some answers, and that we nee-d them now.” When he looks at me, his green eyes glowing with ba-rely contained intensity, a strange fear grips my heart.

“You’re… right,” I acknowledge, “so you can sit down now, and I promise I will share everything I know.”

He stares at me for a minute, and then returns to sit on the log. Xavier sits down as well, and I can s-en-se his gaze. Knowing he is looking at me gives me the jitters in my stomach, for some unknown reason.

“For quite some time now, I have been seeing visions. Usually they are about people, some sort of elite group that lives in a tall castle, but some give me views of the world beyond the castle. Based on what I’ve seen up to this point, I believe that we have landed in the world of my visions. Given the conversations I’ve witnessed, I also think that this world is not a physical world, but exists in some sort of spiritual s-en-se, and is also the home of the Shifters.”

“What the-“ Yi curses un-der his breath, and the rest of the group reacts similarly. Ray in p@rticular is looking both confused and almost annoyed, ru-bbing his knuckles together in a worried fashion.

“What did you hear?” Ray asks, but his voice is quic-kly drowned out by the others. Everyone comes forward with questions at once.

“Mona, what do you mean by saying this world isn’t physical?” Griffin queries while ru-bbing the bark on the log. “Looks pretty real to me.”

“Just what I said. I believe that this is the spirit world, kind of similar to what we have heard about heaven or hell. Except this is obviously much different,” I speak, sounding much more confident than I feel. “I mean, there’s Shifters absolutely everywhere. There seems to be no other explanation.”

“Last time I checked, we were in that dark room in Headquarters,” Yi comments, “even if this is the Spirit world, how in the world could we have ended up here? Unless we’re dead.”

“No, I don’t think we are,” I as-sert, standing up from my perch. I cast a glance at the sky, which is still covered in heavy fog and thick clouds. “I think, somehow, I transported us here. And don’t ask me how, because I honestly have no clue.”

The group breaks into chatter, with everyone talking among themselves. Strangely relieved by finally sharing what has been within my head for quite some time, I tilt my head to let the mist embr@ce me, dancing across my jawline and chilled skin. My eyes close, and I let my s-en-ses encompas-s my entire b©dy, trying to feel everything around us.

“I don’t un-derstand how this is not a physical world when we can feel things, and we all still retain our bodies,” Danae says hesitantly, “how can you be so sure?”

“I’m not.” I open my eyes with new focus and clarity. It is time to test out the conjectures I have made, seeing if it is possible once and for all. “Just… let me see…”

Xavier quic-kly stands behind me as I close my eyes again. “Are you okay?” He murmurs softly into my ear. My heart starts beating like a drum, distracting me from the swirl of thoughts I am trying to create.

“Xavier, stay there,” I command, all the while thinking of words concerning pain. Strike. Blood. Hurt. Ache. Stab. Destroy. As I let the words boil within me, a spirit spear begins to materialize in my hand. Except this time, it isn’t a spear, but a miraculous, sparkling sickle. It looks deadly, with a sharp curve and pointed ti-p. I marvel at the size of it, and the feeling of power that it gives me.

I look out among the group, and I can tell none of them can see the weapon. They are only staring at me in confusion. I somehow know that now is the time.

plea-se work, I beg as I bring down the sickle upon a nearby tree with all of my might. Collective g@sps erupt from everyone, and then we all look in stunned silence. Myself more than anyone else, quite honestly.

“Move!” Xavier jumps and pushes me out of the way as the tree comes crashing towards the ground, hitting it with a resounding thump. In the process, my sickle falls from my hands and lands on Xavier. No, the correct phrase would be that it seemed to melt on Xavier, dissolving into nothingness as soon as it hit both him and the ground.

I am on my hands and knees now, covered in dirt. Deprived of the strength to move, I just stay in my exact position. But once I finally look up, I find that once again I am the center of attention.

I turn my head laboriously towards the falling tree, seeing the clean cut where the tree had been severed from its trunk.

After a few more seconds of this awkward silence that seems to be the norm among our group, Griffin speaks up. “So… North?”

* * *

We have been trekking for endless days, and short nights. It seems at the beginning like every step is leading towards deliverance, yet when I lose that hope towards the evenings it seems like we are only walking farther away from our goals. We try to rest, but I am just too anxious. So far we have seeing nothing, and no one, except the Shifters.

Even them I only catch sight of once or twice, and only at a glance, as if they are trying to hide from us. It is strangely disconcerting to see the Shifters running from us, like we are the villains in all of this. I guess in their point of view, we may be.

To try and pas-s the time while both walking and running, I practice ma-king weapons. After lots of experimenting, I have figured out that the weapons won’t hurt tangible people, but will affect the world around us. I was scared to try it before, but now I realize it is necessary for both our survival and for an even higher purpose that none of us may even realize yet. Alre-ady I get the feeling in my heart that we are supposed to be traveling towards the water, because the water is close to the castle. And the castle is the key to everything… at the center of the uncertainty.

For there must be a reason for why we have landed here. There must be a reason for why I have been seeing all of these crazy visions. There must be a reason for why my heart can’t st©p beating every time I see a blue-haired werewolf’s face.

Well, that might be totally unrelated. But… not really. I think.

Maybe he is the one at the center of everything, because he certainly occu-pies most of my thoughts. I just can’t keep myself from wanting to brush his hair out of his eyes, and to just stare into them to my heart’s content. I always have the urge to t©uçh him, to trace his cheek or—shamefully—hisl-ips. Even when I’m thinking about other things, the in¢v-mbent de-sire is always there, re-ady to distract me at every turn. And just like before, in the cave, I just about can’t take it anymore.

I’ve tried everything. Distancing myself, talking to Ray and Griffin, and even ma-king myself keep my eyes downwards at all times so I wouldn’t have to look at him. But by this point, at which four long days have come and gone, I know that there is no use. The madness is overwhelming, and will continue to be until I do something about it.

I remember the shame of his rejection at the cave, but now it is almost like a distant memory, faded from the intensity of my brewing emotions. The strange thing about all this inner turmoil I have been having for quite a while now, and the one factor that makes absolutely no s-en-se to me in the context of my emotions, is that he isn’t different from the others. Everyone treats me politely—except for Yi, who’s a j£rk—and in p@rticular Griffin makes me feel warm and safe whenever I’m near. They all have the same eyes, besides Griffin and Danae, with the exact same intensity and sheer beauty. All of the men are also undeniably attrac-tive physically in their own way, and I can’t really rank any of them above the other on an objective standpoint.

But at the same time, he’s not like the others. And I have grown to realize this over the awkward silences and boring chatter that does nothing to st©p me from facing the truth. And the truth is… I’m tired, desperate, and hungry. In both the literal and figurative s-en-se.

Which is why I’m oh so gracefully stumbling over to Xavier’s side as the world lies in slumber, waiting for the new day to come.

“Xavier,” I whisper, crouching down and tou-ching his shoulder. Even this feels invigorating, in all the wrong ways. I’m inwardly both repelled and fascinated by my thoughts at this moment, especially after a p@rticularly dreary period of time.

His eyes fli-cker open, and I slowly gesture for him to follow me. He just stares back at me while blinking, and I soon grow impatient with him. quic-kly I back into the trees, retreating until I am one with the night. A slight crunch of the leaves echoes behind me, and I know he is not too far behind.

Once I feel like we are far enough away so that we can talk quietly, I st©p and lean against a pretty intimid@t!ng, monster-like tree. “Mona…” Xavier gro-an s as he reaches me, probably still half asleep. “What… why…”

I don’t know why I find his sleepy expression so cute, and I don’t plan on finding out at the moment.

“We nee-d to talk.”

At this, Xavier’s head snaps up and he shakes himself out of sleep. He blinks a few times, and then gives me his full, undivided attention. I feel strangely pressured by his stare, like I don’t want to disappoint him after I just woke him up during our precious nap time. “Is it about you apologizing for flir-ting with Griffin and Ray every single second of the day? Because you’re going to have to do much more than drag me out here in the middle of the night for me to forgive you.” He snaps a little bit, obviously just a little bit grumpy.

“flir-t? What in the-“

“Don’t even try to deny it. You were doing that on purpose to make me angry.” Xavier’s cheeks color a little bit, his eyebrows tilted in annoyance. Although disconcerted myself, I watch his expressions with interest.

“All I wanted… was to avoid you,” I say softly, eyes downcast. At this Xavier’s eyes wi-den, and then a bitterness enters his features.

“So…” He slowly states, “What changed?”

A silence stretches between us as I try to figure out how to phrase my next words. I soon give up, unable to make much coherent s-en-se. “I don’t un-derstand,” I choke, sliding down the tree onto the ground. “I just don’t get it.”

When I look up from my hands, Xavier is right there, gazing into my soul with those eyes of his. “You don’t get what?” He asks me gently. His hand brushes against my own, bringing warmth and comfort along with it.

I hastily try to regain my composure. “You should be the same as them, Xavier. You really should be nothing more to me than the means to an end.”

“As them? You mean Griffin and the other guys here?”

“Yes. You were one of the pack back at home, the man who saved my life and made me feel both irritated and comfortable, often at the same time. But that doesn’t explain all of the strange feelings I have been having since we have gotten here towards you, and I just don’t un-derstand what happened.”

Xavier just stares at me, as if silently processing my words. “So you feel attra-cted to me, but you don’t get why you feel it towards me and no one else.”

“Right.” My expression brightens a bit. Maybe he gets it. Maybe he can help me get out of this mess, or just talk some s-en-se into my stupid heart.

He thinks for a while, and I watch the skies shift into a de-ep navy blue, with a soft, muted white orb crossing the horizon. Hope blossoms in my che-st in the prospect of relieving this curse of mine. And even if nothing happens, it’s great that I don’t have to pretend anything anymore. I can finally get this out of the way so that I can look towards a hopefully brighter future.

“This is not what I imagined,” Xavier says finally, sighing reluctantly. “Although I had a clue when you k!$$£d me the other night that you were searching for something.”

I blus-h, about as red as a tomato. “Are you toying with me?” I ask, my voice uncannily high. My blus-h de-epens at this, embarras-sing me even more. I look away in shame. I… knew this was a bad idea.

But then I feel a hand on my chin, lifting my face with effortless grace. When I see him again, he is right in front of me, much closer than before. “Mona…” he says in a low, husky voice, his breath dancing on my cheeks. “I’ll give you what you want.” His pupils look dilated, infused with de-sire. My pulse quic-kens as I watch his other hand head towards my cheek, and then travel down to the nape of my n£¢k. “But you have to promise me something.”

“W-what?” I ask as Xavier’s face looms ever closer. His eyelashes are almost brushing my cheeks, and his hands are filling me with both incredible warmth and insatiable de-sire.

“You must… promise to surrender yourself to me. Entirely.” He says this with such temptation, each word melting like honey from hisl-ips. “If you don’t do this, then you must leave now… while you still can.”

My heart nearly bur-sts out of my che-st. Surrender? There is something about the word that is so s-en-suous, exploiting my s-en-ses and overturning my defenses until I am only a puddle onto the ground. un-der normal circu-mtances I would never stand for it. I would abhor the word, and if it were an object I would throw it on the ground and stomp on it with my feet. I like to think I am a strong person, who is independent and can think for myself, and to surrender is to become subject to another’s will. It is an impossible request. My pride would never…

Hisl-ips brush against my forehead, trailing down my nose with breathtaking pas-sion. “I want you to be mine,” He whispers, drawing back to look me in the eye. “Just say the word.” He waits for me, watching my reaction.

Completely un-der his spell, I murmur, “yes.” It is as if I am helpless to my own selfish cravings, a slave to the pas-sion I wasn’t even supposed to have in the first place.

Instantly after my response ourl-ips meet with furious de-sire, and Xavier takes his hands away from my face only to gr-ab my arms and push me r0ûghly against the forest floor.

It is at these moments when I realize just how powerless I really am.

“Say my name, Mona,” he whispers f0rç£fully in between k!sses, ni-bbling at my ear-lobe and then bringing hisl-ips towards my collarbone. “Yearn for me.” Our breathing is heavy, even frantic as we scramble to fulfill each other’s pas-sions.

Myl-ips are covered again, and I drown in ecstasy.

T B C