??A Howl In The Night??
?She’s mine?
?From Novel r0m@n�
?Chapter 29?
?To Be or Not To Be… That is the Question?
I have never been good at ma-king decisions. Especially important ones. Especially ones that have the potential to end the entire existence of either the werewolf or Shifter race.
“Mona, dear, you seem to be swooning on us whenever you come in this room.” A pearly, magical laugh travels towards my ears. Two guards hasten to my side, and although my eyes are closed, I can s-en-se their heavy footsteps.
It is Griffin who gets to me first, his cold hands tou-ching my arms lightly, and then brushing across my forehead. At first his t©uçh is icy, then filled with a heat that br@nds me like an iron. A scream echoes throu-gh the room, and it takes a moment for me to realize that it is mine.
Each t©uçh seems to be getting worse. I don’t remember it hurting this bad before.
My eyes fly open and the first thing I see is Griffin’s face, twisted with worry. “What is wrong, Mona?” he asks me softly.
I say nothing, reaching with one slender arm to t©uçh my forehead. It burns. It burns like nothing I have ever felt before. A small cry escapes me.
“Is it your forehead? What are you feeling?” His beautiful brown eyes search me anxiously, peering somehow into the depths of my soul. His hand reaches up and alarm immediately enters my b©dy. My arm suddenly is pushing him away, tears flowing from my face. What is this agony?
Griffin draws back in surprise, hurt in his eyes. I feel so disappointed. So guilty as he turns away.
“plea-se…” Stars are dancing before my eyes as I struggle to my feet. The two guards steady me as I start to wo-bble. “I’m f-fine. Where a-am I? What is-”
“Do you not remember anything?” Markus questions. I shake my head in response.
“Sorry, it is just…” Memories are swirling within my head. I gr-ab my temples when I find that a hole seems to exist within my memories, a hole that somehow seems to correlate with the sp©t where Griffin t©uçhed me. I angrily grasp for it back, and faded wisps start to return. It takes a minute for me to finally recover everything that had happened. “Free,” I murmur, falling back into a chair that the guards had retrieved.
“Sharuken seems to give you quite the shock,” Gizelda comments, “I know it is an experimental procedure, but we feel quite confident that it will deliver the de-sired results.”
Random thoughts are distracting me, ma-king it difficult for me to listen to the Council. Xavier’s face keeps appearing before me, his green eyes staring into my soul. I try to think of what he would tell me right now, and the imaginary Xavier’s expression morphs into a face of pure despair.
Xavier melts my heart with one look as he begs, my mind flashing to that one night at the h0tel. “Just plea-se, let us be anything but this! You can treat me like dirt, or a child, for anything from you is better than nothing at all. I can be a pla-ything to you if you wish, as long as I am something!”
“plea-se… don’t do this to me!”
I nearly fall off the chair when I realize that I accidentally spoke the last plea aloud. It is as if I am finally returning to reality, only now remembering that I am with the Council and they can hear my every word. Subconsciously I clutch my head in my hands and start to cry. I can’t get rid of the mental image of Xavier’s face as he asks for forgiveness.
“Pardon me?” Gizelda asks with a clear tone of disapproval.
“I… I, I…” I struggle to regain my s-en-ses. “I cannot follow throu-gh with the procedure, High One.”
Griffin turns to stare at me, icily surveying my discomfort. “And why is that?” he asks so softly that I ba-rely realize he is actually speaking. I turn a de-ep shade of scarlet red. This is it. This is crunch time.
“I just… can’t,” I mumble, looking away from Griffin. Away from everyone.
This disease is destroying me. Even now I am lvsting for Xavier’s t©uçh, and honestly, it feels like I would die without it. I just know I can’t go throu-gh the procedure with a condition like this.
After a shocked silence, Cyrus narrows his eyes. I glance at him warily. “We un-derstand you have some feelings for your past mate,” he begins, “and we regret that you have fallen into such a predic@m£nt. Such a situation would not be wished upon anyone… especially any of our own. However, you must un-derstand that upon your shoulders rests the destiny of the werewolf race. You are so crucial to our mission… our purpose as werewolves. This is why it is so important that you accept our offer. We are not acting in our own best interest, but in the best interest of our entire race.”
“We implore you to consider our offer,” Markus speaks firmly.
Griffin steps closer to me, though his eyes are on the Council. “She nee-ds time. Allow her some time to think.” He speaks with the regal authority of a king, but I can tell he is nervous.
Ferrars looks slightly relieved, most likely at the chance that he may keep his current position. “She does nee-d time. I agree,” he says quic-kly.
The Council discuss among themselves whether to allow me more time. I try not to overhear them, although it is difficult not to. Seriously. I am about to have a temper tantrum. If they don’t give me any time…
“We will deliver an ultimatum tomorrow at noon,” Cyrus finally says, his words nearly scaring me out of my skin. “You may leave now.”
So now I have less than a day to decide whether to help the werewolf race and lose Xavier in the process or abandon it entirely. Certainly seems like a lose-lose situation.
I can only wonder what Xavier’s real reaction would be if he was here. And I also can’t help but ask myself why I care so much.
Griffin t©uçhes the small of my back with his hand, and it doesn’t hurt because of the layer of cloth. I breathe a sigh of relief. I hate that I feel like this, but there is not much I can do. I had no clue that this bond between Xavier and I would become such a curse.
He tentatively leads me outside of the meeting room, acting as if I was made of glas-s. “What’s wrong with you?” he asks angrily, as soon as we leave the room. His face is twisted in anger and confusion. I stare back at him with the same expression.
He glares at me, then turns away briefly. When he looks back, he is somewhat subdued. More like the Griffin… the Scotty I know.
“I don’t know…” I guiltily glance at him, then at my outstretched hands. Wh!pping my head around, I search for anyone, anyone besides Griffin.
As a guard leaves the meeting room, I pounce. Running to him, I place one hand on his. He jumps away as if I set him on fire. “I’m sorry, Chos£n One! Did I offend you?” He asks in anguish, c@r£ss!nghis hand and kneeling before me.
My hand doesn’t burn in the slightest, and I stare at it in curiosity. In fact, a warm tingle spre-ads throu-gh my b©dy and makes me smile.
“Mona. It’s Mona.” I bend beside him, looking into his emerald green eyes. “Did my t©uçh hurt you?” I feel sorry for him because of the shock and alarm I can detect in his eyes.
“No, Chos£n One,” he responds softly, “but nobles never t©uçh me. I’m sorry for acting in a detestable manner.”
“I’m not a noble. And I am Mona! I don’t want you to call me by any other name! And st©p apologizing!” I hate to see such a handsome guy kneel before me in such a manner. I don’t deserve this measure of respect.
“I apologize.” He bows his head, and then tentatively rises to his feet. He disappears within seconds, narrowly managing to avoid my anger. He completely ignored me.
Forgetting about the guard within seconds, I turn back to Griffin, ashen with the realization that it is only him.
“It is only your t©uçh I cannot bear,” I whisper, staring up into his eyes. He looks back in horror.
“What can you possibly mean by that?” He asks, subconsciously reaching towards my arm. I snap it away, ashamedly glancing at the ground. I can’t tell him. I can’t tell him of this awful disease that has robbe-d my every de-sire, hope, and stray thought.
I say nothing, guiltily looking around me. After a second of hopeless deliberation, my thoughts turn to the one who started all this. The one that made me look like an idiot in the meeting room.
“I have to see him. I have to talk to him.” I shake my head, and then deliberately turn away from Griffin for the millionth time. “I’ll find that guard. He will tell me where he is.”
“Where who is?” Griffin asks, his voice escalating in anger, “Mona, you better tell me right now who you are talking about!” He stalks after me as I travel in the direction of some nearby guards.
It is then that I realize that surely… surely Griffin would know. I st©p and look into his brown eyes pleadingly.
“plea-se, Griffin, plea-se… take me to Xavier.” His eyes seem to light on fire when he hears me, and he seems to snarl un-derneath his breath.
“So it is really all about him, isn’t it?” He asks sarcastically. “You can’t even t©uçh me, but you m0@n about him constantly? What has he done that I haven’t? I have protected you from day one-“
“No, Griffin! You don’t un-derstand!”
Well neither do I, but that is beside the point.
“Well then, enlighten me.” He crosses his arms over his che-st. His eyes drill holes throu-gh mine. I’m not getting out of this one.
Tears start to fall from my eyes. “It’s the… it’s the…”
He softens as he watches my meltdown for a few seconds. “What is it, sweetheart?”
The endearment stings as I start to fall before him. He catches me on the way down, tou-ching my arm and w@!st. Instantly I burn as if on fire, screaming loudly. He shifts his hands so that a layer of cloth separates us instantly, and the relief slowly comes. I cannot control the sobs, no matter how ha-rd I try.
He holds me for a while, and I temporarily forget myself in his embr@ce. I forget about my tainted b©dy, my horrible afflictions. It feels like I have almost regained a missing piece of myself.
But of course, it only lasts for a moment.
“I’m cursed, Griffin,” I whisper, staring blankly upwards. “I… nee-d to talk to Xavier about the curse.”
“But Mona… didn’t you hear?” He asks quietly, steadying me.
“Hear what?”
Silence enters the room for a few seconds while Griffin seems to ponder exactly how to phrase his next words.
“He’s gone.”
~ Xavier ~
I pace the room, worry creasing my brow. “What am I supposed to do, Ray?” I ask a figure huddling in the corner of the room. The bundle of fur shakes its head, and then wearily turns to lie on the cold floor.
It has been two long days since I have seen Mona, and each second has been like an eternity. If I think really ha-rd , I can still remember herl-ips upon mine. It feels so good for a minute, but then I remember that I am never going to see her again.
The second Mona stepped upon the table to s£nd the shifters away… I knew that the Council would never give her back. Maybe Mona didn’t notice, but I saw the glimmer of excitement in Cyrus’s face. He is such a sly old dog… wanting to get his dirty paws on the only good thing that happened to the werewolf race in hundreds of years. The others had a similar expression, but none compared to his.
I want to pitch a fit about “finding her first” and all that, but turns out I didn’t even do that. Some guy beat me to the punch and I didn’t even know it. In addition, he stole her heart as easily as it took me to fall in love with her. Although I guess her heart didn’t belong to me anyway. It sure changes things, looking at the situation like this. I never thought myself to be a thief, but turns out I’m in jail for a reason, if not the one they put me in here for.
I f!nger the bars of the cell, made out of a strange metal that cannot be bent by werewolves. Trust me, I tried. We are not getting out of this place without help from the outside.
What I really hate about being locked in here is that I’m truly helpless. It makes me think of all the other times when I have been like this. The list stretches on and on, though most recently Mona’s awakening stirred a similar reaction in my che-st. It really hurts… not being able to save the people I love.
Does Mona really nee-d saving? I sit down, placing my head in my hands in frustration. I suppose she is safe here. More than she ever was with me. It seems like every time she was near me she would land in a near death experience.
Griffin looks like a more capable guy than I am, although I would like to think of myself as more handsome. Of course, it isn’t true, and we couldn’t be any more different. He looks more humanlike than I, without the green eyes and crazy hair. I can only hope Mona finds my bizarre looks more appealing. This is probably all I have left, if even that, over Griffin.
“Ray, seriously, help me.” I look back at the furry bundle, and it moves slightly to ba-re its teeth. I give him an exasperated look, and he shifts into his beast form.
“What do you want?!” He looks at me in frustration. “You know there is nothing either of us can do.” His b©dy continues to change into a human form, and I temporarily freeze to watch him. His curious method of shifting always manages to amaze me. He is the only werewolf I know of that can st©p halfway between werewolf and human for a prolonged period of time. The incredible control he has fits in perfectly with his Beast talent. Usually Beast talents lose control over themselves when they shift, but Ray never loses his temper without a reason.
“I nee-d a plan. A plan that can get us out of this cell.” I start to pace back and forth along the bars. “I nee-d to save Mona.”
“You aren’t getting Mona back,” Jake shrugs, lounging in another corner of the cell. “You know that. Just give up.” He looks more worn out than the rest of us, with bags un-derneath his eyes and a dreary glare. He has also been the one most active in trying to think up a plan with me. I know he is pretty fond of Mona and loathes losing her like I do, but seems like he has finally faced the awful facts.
“Come on, Xavier, we both know br@instorming is not going to work very well. We have tried it for about a day and a half and my head is about to explode,” Wes complains, lying on a wooden bench. I think we are all pretty much sick of each other by now.
“I’m not asking you. We all know you aren’t much help,” I snap back, leaning my head against the bars. The golden airhead in our group certainly fits the blond jokes we throw at him every now and then.
Ever since bonding, I at least gather satisfaction from the fact that she will feel some measure of regret if she casts me away. It hurts that it is turning out like this, but a sadistic p@rt of me is happy that she now fully belongs to me. The Council can’t separate our bond. All I nee-d to do is somehow convince Mona that she nee-ds me, and perhaps she can somehow convince the Council to let me stay with her.
That plan may be ha-rder than I thought to achieve, considering that I am stuck down in the dungeon. It isn’t that bad of a place, our cell having four be-ds and a decent bathroom. The floor and walls seems to be made of solid rock and the room is decorated sparsely. It reminds me of the h0tel we stayed at, except the doors have bars.
“Ray, what have you been doing?” Jake asks Ray while he surveys a small hole in the wall. “Have you been trying to drill throu-gh the walls?”
“You have any better suggestions?” He asks in response, and then shows all of us a thin, sharp nail. “I found this stuck in the wall yesterday.”
“Like that will do any good,” I mutter, falling onto my ha-rd be-d and staring at the ceiling. I miss her. I miss her more than I would ever be willing to admit.
“Hey, I did manage to make a few holes in the wall,” Ray protests, showing us the dot-sized pinpricks scattered in one brick. “I was hoping to loos£n this brick and then work my way back. Surely we could get to the wall from here and then fight our way out.”
I narrow my eyes at the holes. “That doesn’t even look like it goes throu-gh the entire brick. You may have made it halfway.”
“I’m working on it!” he huffs, and I laugh.
“How long are you planning on doing that? A year?” Wes jokingly asks. Ray blus-hes, although it is ha-rd to tell because he is shifting at the same time. Obviously he is done talking to us.
Ray, now a gigantic wolf, continues to hold the nail in his teeth and push it into the rock. I turn my head away from him in hopelessness. We are doomed.
Once I think about it, technically this is all Ray’s fault. If he hadn’t Awakened her, we never would have gotten in this mess. Too delirious and angry to second guess myself, I launch into a series of thoughts and accusations against Ray in my mind. I have nothing better to do.
Just when I wonder how exactly I am going to murder Ray when we get out of here, a pair of footsteps interrupts my gleeful thinking. Intrigued, I turn to the man coming towards the bars. It doesn’t take long for me to turn back away in disgust.
Griffin doesn’t smile as he steps up to the bars, inches from my face. As I try to stay calm, I notice that today he looks like a pheonix—bright with the emotion of either fury or excitement—with his red hair and animated expression.
“What are you doing here?” Jake asks resignedly after I refuse to address Griffin. “Come here to gloat?”
“Well, I was supposed to come down here to inform you all that you will be either exiled or exterminated this Saturday, but I’m sure that is a little bit depressing for all of you at the moment… so I will try to start out with some good news.”
We all look at him dryly as he makes a big show out of trying to think of something.
“Yeah, yeah we get it,” I huff, “nothing good for us delinquents. I mean, we only found the human destined to save our entire werewolf race and basically delivered her into your greedy hands.”
“Now, now, not so fast.” He laughs, “You seem to forget that you actually were trying to keep her away from us when we caught you.”
“Only because we were afraid of something like this happening to us.”
“Look, don’t get angry at me. I’m only the mess£nger,” he cautions, taking a step back from the bars as my face grows red. “It’s Mona. It’s all because of her. You can blame her for all the problems you get into from now on.”
“You know I can’t do that,” I shake my head, looking at the floor. Somewhat subduing myself, I look up at him. “What do you stand to gain from all this?”
“Well, the Council says they will give me back my birthright if Mona agrees to stay at headquarters. As if she has a choice.” He pauses, looking right into my eyes. “But I don’t care about that. That is not what’s important to me.”
“What is important to you, Griffin?” All four of us nail him with an iron gaze. He seems to be growing a bit uncomfortable, squirming slightly.
“Her,” he nearly chokes, before straightening and trying to eye us coldly. “Everything about her… I want to myself. I do have selfish motives, but are they truly different from yours? All I want is to protect her and love her as a mate should.”
He is right. I am really no different than him. Why am I acting all high and mighty?
He steps closer to the bars, closer to my face. “Xavier, I don’t hate you. I’m actually grateful to you for the love and kindness you gave her, because even though she doesn’t admit it, she has certainly been affected for the better. You also saved her life several times, from what I have heard, and that makes me respect you more than anyone else at Headquarters. I know you’re a good guy. Maybe a little res£ntful… but I would be too in your position. plea-se believe me… try to un-derstand.”
“Then surely, if you really felt that way, you would get us out of here,” I say, basically flabberg@sted by his confession. It certainly seemed like he hated me.
The strangest thing of all is that I do un-derstand. Though I don’t want to.
“Well, that is an interesting point. Why don’t I get you out of here?” He laughs. “If only it were that simple.”
“Sometimes, it is.”
“First off, I don’t have the power to let you go. Secondly, even if I did let you go, I would be worried that you would go off and do something stupid. Just out of curiosity, what would you do if I got you out?”
“Save Mona,” I say fiercely. I don’t like pla-ying games.
“Yeah… right. See, that qualifies as something stupid. It isn’t in my best interest for you to do that, and once you think about it, it isn’t in yours either. What are you going to do when you save Mona?”
“Don’t tell me what’s in my best interest or not,” I growl, and he takes another step back.
“Answer the question, Xavier. Don’t be difficult.”
“I suppose, run from you. And the rest of the Council.” I don’t really know what I would do. That’s a thought provoking question, which brings me back to the central question I asked myself a few minutes before. I start to drown in my doubt, struggling to stay above the water.
“You know you can’t run for long. And inwardly, you know Mona is safer here than she ever was with you.”
I feel as if I have been kicked in the gut. I want to shout at Griffin for saying such lies, but then I remember that I basically admitted the same things to myself earlier. I’m not stupid, no matter how obstinate I want to remain at this point.
“You know, we haven’t even addressed Mona’s feelings here,” he says slowly, carefully. “I never planned to get into this big discussion with you, but while we are here, might as well cover the most important issue here as well.”
“I love her. And I know she feels at least a little love towards me in return.”
“I know you do. But the problem here is not what you think.” He nods his head slightly, “she holds too much affection for you. You may have been better off if she hated your guts.”
My hands grip the bars, holding them so ti-ghtly that my knuckles turn stark white. “What do you mean by that?”
“The Council is not going to let you live, you know. They absolutely cannot allow you to be with Mona. And this only makes things ha-rder for her.”
“How come?!”
“They nee-d someone they can control, Xavier, and you are a very strong werewolf who has bended the rules time and time again without reaping the consequences. They are afraid of an uprising. If you were allowed to be with Mona, members of our community would start to look up to you, not the Council. That was the first thing they realized while discussing this issue, for their minds are all focused on power. They wish to keep their power at any cost.”
I am nearly frozen with shock. I never thought myself to be a threat to the Council. In fact, I never meant to break any of the rules in the first place. How could they possibly think I was trying to… hoard Mona for some kind of rebellion?
“I’m easier to control,” Griffin says softly, looking at his feet. “I’m a shameful crossbreed who happens to be born in a position of power. They can rip away my status and give it back to me on a silver platter. I can’t be much more of a puppet than I am now. Even my father thinks of me only as a tool to be used.”
Yes. You do have a nice sob story. I get it. You are so unfortunate to be stuck with Mona. It is really quite a shame.
“But what about Mona, Griffin?” I ask in frustration. “Why is it ha-rder for her?”
“Well, think about it. The Council is faced with quite the dilemma here. They can’t just pry you two ap@rt, because they know Mona will be seriously messed up as a result. They can’t keep you two together, because of the reasons I mentioned earlier. It helps matters a little bit because I am also her mate, but doesn’t eliminate the issue by far. She obviously likes you very much and makes this problem impossible to ignore. If only they had a way to make Mona forget all about you, to forget this whole escapade with your pack so she and I can be together…”
“No.” Jake instantly says, snapping up from his seat. “They won’t.”
“They can’t.” Wes protests almost in unison. Everyone turns to me to see my own reaction.
“Sharuken?” I ask, my whole b©dy trembling. They wouldn’t dare.
“They will… with or without Mona’s permission. They are ma-king it seem like she has a choice, but she really doesn’t.”
I am about to explode with anger. They seriously are not going to do this to me. To us.
“But anyway, we are getting off t©pic. What I wanted to tell you was that you nee-d to accept it and move on. It will make everything better for the two of you. Just try to forget about each other.”
“That’s impossible! You know I-“
“I know. I probably un-derstand you more than anyone.” Griffin looks straight at me, stepping so close that I can feel each strained breath. “I hate this. I hate having to say this to you.”
Silence echoes throu-gh the hall as I stare at him in disbelief.
“Maybe, if you wish, the Council could perform the ritual upon you as well-“
“No. No. I couldn’t,” I fiercely turn away, “I… never want to forget her.”
“That’s what I thought,” Griffin smiles slightly, almost wistfully, in satisfaction. “I like you, Xavier. You are the sort of wolf I aspire to be like.”
“I don’t like you.” I snap, though inwardly wondering at the lack of arrogance on his face. He won. He gets her for the rest of eternity. How come he is acting so nice to me?
“Try to think of it this way. The Council consists of arrogant, greedy werewolves, but they do have some basis in morality. Mona isn’t going to live a life of servitude. She will have all the riches she could ever de-sire, as well as extraordinary honors and privileges. In addition, she will be trained in her Spier abilities to fulfill the prophecy and our race’s destiny. What more could you want for her?”
“Happiness. I wish for her to be happy.”
“I’ll do my best. I can’t guarantee that she will be, but I promise I will try to make her the happiest woman in the world.” All of us almost laugh at Griffin’s expression, full of intensity and fervor.
“If you can make her happy, by all means… do it,” I choke softly, my face twisted with hidden mirth. He glares at me, obviously noticing our ba-rely-hidden chuckles.
Mona? Happy? What a joke. It’s impossible. She isn’t exactly easy to plea-se, to say the least.
“Well,” he looks at his watch awkwardly, “Looks like I’m nee-ded in a few minutes in the meeting room. I’ll come back later and tell you the verdict. They are trying to decide what their final proposition to Mona will be.”
I watch him start to walk away with a resignation that shocks me. Everything he said makes perfect s-en-se. There is really no point in trying to save Mona.
Griffin st©ps for a second, and then swivels around to face me. “I’m sorry,” he whispers, then quic-kly retreats up the narrow stairs at the end of the hallway.
Why did things have to end up like this? Now even a cowardly crossbreed is feeling… pity towards me. I feel like the lowest of werewolves—a criminal. Now that my fighting spirit has been su-cked away, nothing is left except a big, gaping hole in my heart.
“Hey, I finished another hole!” Ray shouts, showing us proudly the new dot he had made. I shake my head in dismay.
“Xavier, what are you going to do?” Jake asks me in low tones, the serious one of the bunch. He calmly takes in my misshapen appearance as a tear starts to fall slowly from my eye. Embarras-sed, I brush it away.
“I don’t know, Jake. I just don’t know anymore.”
“Mona seems to be getting along pretty well with Griffin,” Ray comments obnoxiously. The others start to glare at him but he doesn’t notice, delirious from the long hours in a dark cell. “She seems like she will be fine here.”
“Seems so.” I reluctantly admit, though anger is building within me. Ray is really getting on my nerves today. He always knows the best ways in which to annoy me.
“He seems to act like a real mate. Someone who is responsible and caring. I think you can rest easy, Xavier.”
“And I wasn’t?!” I exclaim, starting to shift into my wolf form. Wes and Jake start to laugh, for reasons unknown. This has happened so many times today.
“Uh… do I have to answer that?”
I pounce on him mid-shift, b!tt!g his ear and clawing his fur. He yowls in pain as I start to draw blood. We growl at each other as he rips away and completes the shift, now a wolf that is larger than I.
The fight continues for several minutes, mostly consisting of risky moves and stupid decisions. I knew I shouldn’t have gone for his tail, and I did it anyway, leaving my back open for attack. I really nee-d to brush up on fighting tactics in this form.
“Guys…” A familiar voice interrupts our tussle, and we instantly st©p. A slinky form materializes outside of the cell, leaning against the back wall.
“Yi!” we basically shout in unison. He looks around anxiously then turns back to us with one f!nger on hisl-ips.
“I’m here to bust you guys out of this cell. Danae’s posing as one of the maids here at headquarters but it won’t last for long. She is getting so many wrinkles that she nee-ds a trip to the laundromat.”
“Where have you been?” I ask him, completely shifted back to human form. He smiles and wi-nks.
“They never captured me at the mansion. Seems that they forgot I even belonged to the pack. Funny how much a Stealth talent can manage, huh?”
“How did you get in here?” Jake queries.
“The front door,” he wi-nks, “It is the greatest experience, walking around and not even having one cute girl wi-nk at me. So liberating.”
“I still don’t get how you did it. That’s impossible. They must have noticed you.”
“Details, details. We will get to them later.” Yi yawns, and then pu-lls out a slender key. “I got this from the red-head that just left.”
“Griffin? So you have been in here the whole time?” I ask in annoyance, “Why didn’t you tell us?”
“How much fun would that be? And it’s only been a few minutes. He walked out, I walked in. And he had his key dangling from his belt loop as if he wanted it to be stolen. I could have sworn I saw him grin on the way out.”
That sly dog—quite literally. I can’t help but like him now, no matter how aggravated I am at my pres£nt situation.
“So like Jake asked, what are you going to do?” Yi asks me slowly. “Are you going to stay here and try to save Mona? Or are you going to leave with the rest of us?”
“Wait. All of you are going to leave?” I turn and look at the other pack members. They all make weird expressions that I can’t possibly decipher.
“We want to support you Xavier. But we all think it is a lost cause… a lost cause that is going to get us all killed. Griffin explained the situation pretty well.” Jake explains. He looks guilty… as he should.
“I just can’t,” I whisper, “I can’t give up on her.”
I remain silent while Yi glides over to the door, placing a key in the lock. There is a cli-ck as it turns, and the bars are finally open. I am finally free.
“You have a choice. You can either come with us now, or you can stay here and fight for her. But I promise you… if we leave, we are not coming back. This is your one and only chance.”
Everyone stands and starts to exit the cell. Yi, however, comes in and sits by me on the wooden bench. He tries his best to look comforting, and fails miserably.
“I saw Mona in her room. She looked happy. I really do hate this for you, Xavier, but we will help in any way we can. If you truly want to fight, I’m sure we can convince the others to try.”
I am ba-rely listening to Yi, immersed in a tidal wave of memories; Mona’s smiling face after I saved her in the forest, her adorable expression of annoyance that I had come to know so well… her look of pure elation after the first k!sswe shared. I can’t bear this. I can’t lose her.
Mona grins at me as I give her steak. She yells at me in indignation after I k!ssher cheek. And somewhere, in the back of my mind, she sleeps in Rays arms, soaking we-t in a large fountain.
That’s right… I almost forgot about that incident. I was so keen on getting her back, so eager to get on her good side that the reason why I got mad at her sli-pped my mind. Even though I am not mad at her in the slightest now, the main message hits me like one of Ray’s punches in the stomach.
She doesn’t nee-d you. She doesn’t nee-d you like you nee-d her.
This is the final straw. I sever the last remaining bond with my emotions and stand up like a robot. I have no ha-rd feelings towards her, but I have to let her go.
She was never mine to begin with.
No wonder she never felt the attachment I did. No wonder she never loved me in return. Even though Griffin said otherwise.
She was never mine.
The last tear I plan on shedding in a long time escapes my eye as I firmly take the first step outside of the cell door. It is over… forever.
I only wish I could say good bye.
~ Mona ~
I stare at Griffin in disbelief. “What?”
“He’s gone. He disappeared from his cell a few days ago. We have been trying to find him and the rest of his pack, but they are nowhere to be found. Yi, your friend, is a very clever Stealth talent. He must have helped them escape.” He sees my tears before they start to fall and pu-lls me close. “I’m sorry Mona. I wish you didn’t have to deal with this. You don’t deserve it.”
“I wanted to talk to him.” I say, still frozen by the news Griffin delivered. “I wanted to see him again.”
“I know you did.” He squee-zes me ti-ght, though careful to avoid tou-ching my skin. The true impact of his words seems to hit me at this moment.
He left me.
He abandoned me.
Pain blossoms in my che-st, swallowing me entirely. Am I even a person anymore? What am I? All I can see is pain… hurt, sorrow, and betrayal.
I should have run after him when he tried to leave last week. I should have held on to him and never let him go. And now he’s… gone. Leaving me with this awful disease that makes me feel such de-sire.
I am choking from lack of air, for it feels like he has taken away my willingness to breathe along with my heart. It is strange to think—that he has stolen my heart—but in this state of insanity it is easier to believe.
All I really know right now is that I nee-d him, for reasons that are unclear. I nee-d him like no one else I have ever met before.
I hate this feeling of dependence, but it overtakes my b©dy until it is impossible to deny. And now I can never see him again… feel his warml-ips, or hear his musical laugh. I miss it all, every single obnoxious, insolent p@rt of him that makes him so special.
This pain.
“plea-se help me,” I start to sob, hanging onto Griffin like I am never going to let go. I accidentally make contact with his skin, and the pain causes me to rip ap@rt from him. I stumble across the floor, holding my arm where I had t©uçhed Griffin. A large red mark stretches across it.
I can’t deal with this anymore.
I try to wait until the pain subsides, wait until I gain some semblance of sanity. “I will do it.” I choke, softly spitting out the cursed words. How I wish I didn’t have to say them… but I must escape.
“Do what?” Griffin gently asks, his voice full of concern. It seems to be the tone of voice he always uses with me lately.
“Anything. Anything that gets rid of the pain. Sharuken, I think they called it.”
“Mona, are you sure?”
I lean on the stone wall, not quite sure what is happening. I think the Council has gathered around me from the sound of the heavy cloaks that are swishing across the floor. I know this is it. I can’t take my words back.
I think of Xavier, of the happy times we experienced together. Of the joyous feelings in my heart that I have anxiously tried to suppress. It all means so much to me. I don’t want to lose it.
But, I don’t want to experience this. Nothing amounts to the anguish of having a heart r!pp£dap@rt and left in pieces. I… don’t want to be hurt in this manner. I must become stronger.
“Yes.”
T B C